Fish Give Me a Weird Vibe Now

A while ago I had a nightmare about fish in the toilet that bite your butt if you're not careful, spreading gross fish venom all through your bloodstream, slowly killing you.
I have very disturbing dreams.


Oh, and just for kicks:You're welcome!

ubergirl

New Post

Skype is like magic.

Anyway.
I've been obsessed with Sheikh Muhammed bin Rashid AlMaktoum of Dubai for about a month now.
He's so nice to everyone.
And look at what he's done with Dubai.




Why can't that be us?
It's frustrating.

My mother said the other day that when she was in her teens they used to tease Emaratis and laugh at them and call them garawa (villagers) and Bedouins.

Guess who the fuck's laughing now?


And I am very, very angry.
Because they have security and good healthcare and no poverty and sexy turbans and phenomenal technology. And their own theme music!
Oh, and they have a hot piece of sheikh: Click to enlarge

We have people getting away with rape, and people living in poverty, and orphans living among cockroaches, and this:







How's that for theme music, bitches?

It is very sad when people refer to AlFaisaliyah and AlMamlaka :


















As the height of technology in Saudi Arabia. And the worst part is, they brag about them.

In Dubai, I wear whatever I want and no-one has ever said or done anything to me. In Riyadh I am in my black abaya and I get verbally harassed by ill-disciplined teenage boys and Muttawas, and apparently, the law does not protect me from this harassment.
In Dubai, people drink, but I have never seen a drunk person there. In Riyadh, I found an empty bottle of liquor outside my little sister's school.

And I hate people who say "oh, but we have Islaaaaam. We practice Islam! We're much better off."
Practice Islam? Where?
Show me where we practice Islam and I will die happy.

We are a nation of contradictions, and it seems as though we are proud. Or in denial.
Pick your poison.

ubergirl


PS. Fouad AlFarhan has been released!

Life

I saw a dead man lying on the side of the street today. I have yet to react.

I had never seen a dead body before.

It was a hit and run.
Cars should be banned.

ubergirl

Hello, Children...

Why do men wear speedos?

Don't they know how ridiculous they look?

And most importantly, when will it END?

ubergirl

"Patriotism is supporting your country all the time,

... and your government when it deserves it." - Mark Twain


I have gone a whole two days without a driver and I am deeply depressed.
We need to solve this, like, yesterday.

Am I disloyal and truly unpatriotic for wanting to just leave Saudi Arabia?


ubergirl

Random Picture Post

Just because I don't have anything to blog about.

I pass by this building almost everyday on my way back from college. Any guesses as to what that scribble on the wall means? (Taqwa I expect you to get this right, ya ba66a.) (Taken on 4/11/2007)

Random picture I took at the book fair. It is not a coincidence that the people who happened to be there when I took the shot are all men. There were about 20 women, tops the day I went. The man in the picture overhead is a writer, Hamad Al-Jasser. They named all the aisles after famous Saudi writers. Isn't that cute? (6/3/2008)

This was taken at one of my favorite places in the world. Literally where I spent most of my childhood. (16/11/2007)

I took this while I was walking into our house. I happened to look up, and the clouds made a beautiful pattern. It's sad to think of all the other patterns I missed because I rarely take the time to go outside and look at nature and shit. (23/11/2007)

Doodles on a desk at college. I told you this was gonna be random. (28/10/2007)

Take a close look at this one...

It's a chick! I was at a traffic light when I noticed these kids playing with a baby chick. So sweet. And incredibly random. (28/11/2007)

I was looking at this police car and it didn't make me feel any safer. In fact, it made me feel uneasy. The police force in Riyadh (and the fire department) are barely trained and ill equipped to handle anything. (28/3/2007)

I took these this afternoon. I just thought they make Riyadh look pretty. (29/3/2008)

ubergirl

Now THIS is Blasphemy!:

Anyway.

So I promised a rundown of the Q&A with the president of King Saud University, and I think I'd better deliver before I forget the juicy details.

He got a lot of questions about summer programs (which we don't have.)

Now this really pisses me off, because EVERY YEAR we are asked to sign up for the summer program at the secretary's office, and every fucking year they only get a handful of signatures, and they scratch the whole plan, because it's stupid to open the whole school for the summer just for a handful of students in every department.
And I am happy to say, for once, KSU chooses not to do something stupid.

I am beginning to think these people asking for the summer term generally enjoy complaining about things that don't necessarily bother them. Either that or they are the handful of people that sign up, and who happen to be unbelievably loud and obnoxious.

Of course the prez said they'll "look into it", which I hope is code for "Either sign your damn name or shut the fuck up. Now go sit down. Jeez."

A good question was one about the weird 12 PM rule we have at the girl's university. Basically girls cannot leave the university before 12 PM. I really have given up trying to understand this rule, (imposed on us by the Muttawas.)
Don't even try. There is not an explanation. They just like toying with us.
His answer was "we'll try and make it so that all your classes end after 12." Which, I have to admit was the only bullshit answer of the event.
You take a job as the president of our university, and I must say, you seem like a smart guy. You know this rule is complete nonsense. Isn't it your job to defend us, to at least represent us fairly and publicly oppose this rule, instead of giving in to the mutts?
There are many rules made by the Muttawas that King Saud University completely ignores. Such as the fifteen minute prayer-time break that I certainly have never gotten.
We can ignore ridiculous rules when we want to, Mr.Prez. Why the hell not this one?

One girl made a very passionate comment about how students with certain connections get things done easier, and that some teachers are mean and conceited. She raises good points, but suffice it to say I am not impressed by easy applause lines. Mr.AlOthman was outraged, of course. He does not approve of this behaviour and he assured us that it would be dealt with, and I believe him.

My favorite was a pharmaceutical student who talked about how after graduating he has to wait six months for the place where he's supposed to sign up for training to open and can't the University do something about that? He went on about other stuff, but I liked his questions most because they're real problems. Mr.Prez said he really can't do anything about that because it wasn't to do with the University... and I daydreamed a little here, I must say.
Anyway it was a good answer.

A man in a wheelchair asked why they wouldn't let him into medical school (he's doing engineering.) The gist of what the President (politely) said is that we must all pursue careers where we are guaranteed a job, and that the guy's medical condition may not allow him to go into medicine, but they will certainly allow him to be an exceptional engineer. All we need is hard work, and bla bla...
And that got me thinking. I have never seen a doctor in a wheel chair. Not even on TV.
Does anyone know more about this?

That's really all I can remember.

ubergirl

Randomness Part.. 603?

• I like the prez of our university. He's pretty cool. He adressed us all on Sunday and we got to ask questions and everything. It was great.
• Am I a complete loser for reading David Sedaris?:
  
  

• Guilty pleasure: Pride and Prejudice.
  ".. the most determined flirt that ever made her family ridiculous." Classic. Makes me laugh like anything.
• I miss playing in the sand.
• I miss playing in the mud.
• I don't undertand the early settlers? Why did they move into the middle of the desert? I mean, it's fine now, with airconditioning and bottled water, but at the time... What the hell were they thinking? Maybe they were some weird suicide cult that wanted to die of thirst and hunger but failed miserably? It's so weird.

ubergirl

My Biggest Fear

Seriously this shit creeps me out:





Amy Winehouse (AMI WINKHAUSE) version:






ubergirl

A Bunch of Hooey

I read this in the paper yesterday:

"The 'commitittee' Anticipates Women's Day at the Janadriya."

I don't quite understand?


1. Women are not some sort of disease. Why must our arrival be anticipated and prepared for?:

"Oh my God. THE WOMEN ARE COMING!"

"Damn it, AGAIN? Go get your shots everyone... No-one is immune. We must be prepared."

Enough with the drama. Can't we just fucking show up without all the hoopla?



2. I thought this was a 'cultural event.' Why are the Muttawas involved?

WHY ARE THEY ALWAAAAAAAAAAAAYS INVOOOOOOOOOLVED?

It's the damn Janadriya. They talk about it like it's an orgy.
Trust me, it's not.





Not that I'm going.

I'll only ever go when the Muttawas are not part of the 'cultural experience.'

ubergirl

May The Lord Have Mercy on Our Souls

68 People are dead in Gaza, and 200 are injured.

And I keep getting asked to sign some e-petition to get the pictures of the prophet off wikipedia.

You want to talk about a fucking 'conspiracy against Muslims'?

How about when people are dying in the hundreds every day, all we seem to be able to focus on is a cartoonist in Denmark.
You're in on the fucking "conspiracy"!!!
You're fueling it.

ubergirl

Muslim Garb is SEXAI.

I don't understand how this would offend Barack Obama?

It is shocking that anything related to Arabs or Islam is viewed as a negative thing.

People forget that the 'terrrists' are a minority.

I am offended that anyone would find this damaging to a reputation.

I think it's pretty fucking sexy.

ubergirl

Boreidah = LOVE

News from my favorite (I'm serious) part of the country.

Some folks in Boreidah (tell me if i spelt it wrong) are going around painting over pictures of advertisements, and apparently there's some sort of election going on, and the candidates are pissed because their pictures are being vandalized as well.

This is all because some people believe that Islam forbids creating images of faces because it's like trying to recreate God's work.

Yeah. I don't really get it either.

What on earth would we do for comedy if it weren't for the good people of Boreidah?

I'm serious. These people are like cartoon characters.

ubergirl

Curiouser and Curiouser!

Don Imus got fired for calling people 'nappy headed hos', but Bill O'Reilly can say he doesn't want to go on 'a lynching party against Michelle Obama' and there's no outrage?

Huh?

I'm confused.

When someone in the family is on their death bed it is nerve racking.
Sitting at a table having dinner and the phone rings. The room goes quiet and people stare at eachother.
One person slowly gets up and walks over to the phone.
"Allah yistur."
"Na'am?"

Silence.

Everyone around inhales slowly, and then...

Sighs with relief when whoever is on the phone smiles and nods, indicating that we can go back to our meals.
No mourning.
For today.

And all I want to do is quote Sweeney Todd: "Life is for the alive, my dear!"
Yes, in song.


ubergirl

One Day...

I will arrive at the Riyadh airport from a great holiday and not wish I were back at the beach.
One day, I will be absolutely, one zillion percent happy (or even relieved) to be home.


ubergirl

Tarja Halonen

Arabic media has been paying a lot of attention to the American presidential race.
Particularly to the democrats.

A big issue here is that a woman cannot lead a country. No one says this outright, of course.
They don't want people to think they're not modern.

It's more in the tones. The body language.

When I called a friend on it a few weeks ago, she admitted that she thought women were good at some things, men at other things (like leading a country.)
Typical nonsense from an unexpected source.
People never cease to surprise me.

"What about the president of Finland?" I asked.
She is a woman, after all. I can't say I know much about her presidency, but surely she is more of a successful leader than, say, all of the Arab leaders combined? Times 92384934728394721 squared?

Also, she famously resembles my main man, Conan O'Brien, making her all the more capable of successfully running a country.

Anyway.

It angers me how brainwashed our people are. It is 2008 and our educated 20 year olds do not think a woman can run a country.
Their argument is, if we are all truly equal, then why were we created differently? Why are there male and female human beings? Because we are suited to different roles.

Uhh.... No.

We were created looking differently because life is one. big. fucking. TEST.
It is a test to see who will use those differences as a way to divide everyone, and claim superiority (and inferiority, sisters. You contribute to this too.)
That is also why there are black people and white people and Asian people and brown people. Because this is a test to see who will choose to be racist and judge people on what they look like. Or what their genitalia looks like.
And it looks like many of my countrymen are failing this test miserably.
Thay fail to see the bigger picture; that we are more alike than we are different.


That being said, I have to say I'm on the Barack Obama bandwagon.
And you'd all best follow suit.


ubergirl

Organized Religion Makes Me Uneasy

A friend showed me a forum where a somewhat famous and respected sheik issues fatwas on things like threesomes and smoking marijuana.

It saddens me to think that the majority of the people I meet feel the need to seek a sheik's approval of every intimate detail of their lives. For some reason they do not trust themselves to make any kind of judgement, or they distrust their ability to research matters on their own and come to their own conclusions.
These shaikhs capitalize on every one's vulnerability, and their "fatwas" are sometimes nothing more than opinions that have no basis in Islam. And if you tell anybody this they will think you are "some sort of atheist."

I think I am "some sort of being that posses at least one working brain cell."

If you go to these forums, you will see that all of the questions are from people who have probably asked 3294834 sheiks the same question, and might very well go on to ask 32897432894 sheiks the same question, looking for the answer they want.

Very often they are horny old men who are looking for someone to justify their want of... Perverse... Things.
Like the threesome question?

السؤال: إذا كان الرجل متزوج من أكثر من زوجة ، هل يجوز أن يجتمع زوجتين ـ مثلا ـ للمداعبة في نفس الوقت ، أو أن يجامع واحدة والأخرى ترى ذلك أو يداعبها أمام الأخرى ، أو يطلب من زوجيته التعري أمامه ويمارسهم معاً ؟
الجواب : يجوز مداعبتها معاً ولكن لا يجوز تعريتهما لعدم جواز نظر كل منهم إلى عورة الأخرى.

So basically, you can do whatever you want as long as your women keep their eyes closed.
You know, so there's a sense of modesty.

These are the kinds of examples that make a mockery of religion in general.

Faith is a beautiful thing. Religion is a beautiful thing. Sacred. Glorious.
How dare these people invade it in this manner?

We should all stop giving these people a podium.

It is disgusting that while there is a humanitarian crisis in Gaza, the Moral Police are on forums and at their dinner tables preaching about how it is a disgrace that women can rent their own hotel rooms now without the permission of their male guardian.
And many many people blindly mimic this opinion, because someone "more knowledgeable in Islamic law" told them so.

Stop listening to these people. You be the judge.
Who on earth knows your faith, your religion, better than yourself?

Organized religion is what takes the soul out of believers.
Let's just put a stop to it.

ubergirl

Let's Try and Put Things Into Perspective...

I was listening to some people complain about how we Saudis are mistreated in airports all over the world. Going through extra security and having to take off our shoes and answer to rude Europeans about why we're in their country when all we're doing is throwing our money at them and they should be happy about us and anyway, isn't this racist?

I understand why most (probably all) of Saudi Arabia is offended by this treatment.
Don't worry, I am not going to argue that we deserve it because of our evil ways.
(You know, how we enjoy blowing things up.)

I actually think we deserve it for another reason: Karma.

I'll get straight to the point: How horribly do we treat our foreign help?
I'm talking about drivers, maids, Indian construction workers...
And not only are they treated appallingly at airports, but everywhere else.

What we Saudis put them through is torture. I am shocked at how this goes... Not unnoticed; I think people certainly notice it, but what is shocking is how this is acceptable.
We have these people working outside in the July sun for hours on end, when it is illegal to have anyone working in that kind of heat.
And what they are payed is shocking. I heard that on average these people make four hundred riyals a month, that's roughly one hundred and six dollars.
And that is not all. That's probably not even the worst of it!

We have treated them this way for decades.
And we see nothing wrong with this.
And then we wonder why we are treated like the scum of the earth all over the world.

I just wonder why it took so damn long for it all to catch up to us.
I mean, we have missed a huge chance to make up for the mistreatment of our foreign help! HUGE!

I am deeply, deeply ashamed of this.
I think these workers are incredible.
Think of all the hardship they have had to endure in their lives. Compare it to being searched a bunch of times at an airport, what we are complaining of.
Now think of how many of them there are. You probably see dozens of them everyday. You pass them without so much as a smile or a nod, to show your gratitude.
And then we have gone on to play the victim, not even acknowledging what we have done to deserve mistreatment.
Shame on us.

What happened to having perspective?
Where are all the smart people?
Why aren't they on TV telling everyone that they are idiots if all they care about is how rude the customs people are at Heathrow?

After spending twenty years on this earth, I am still confused.
Why don't we all just be nice to everyone? Having empathy is really not that difficult.


ubergirl

Free Fouad!

I have recently learned that a Saudi blogger, Fouad AlFarhan, has spent almost a month in jail.

Get him back to his kids, for God's sake.

Freedom of speech sounds pretty darn good right about now.


ubergirl

Is It Just Me Or...

... Is Barack Obama kind of sexy?



I know. He's a politician and they're icky.

He seems genuine, though.

Madri.

I guess I got a crush on Obama.
Original, I know.

I want a democracy toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I'm so jealous.

ubergirl