As Told By ubergirl87

Nope. Still Can't Properly Open Ketchup Packets.

2009-09-30T16:20:00.000-07:00

I feel I've become more self conscious and inhibited.
For example, anything I think is worth blogging about turns into a 'no one wants to hear about that!'-type internal dialogue minutes later.
Like right now, I'm thinking: What are you typing? No one wants to read about your insecurities.

I'm afraid this is all I've got for the moment.
Anyway.

Today there was a piece in the paper about a mufti denouncing "faking one's virginity."

Last week there was another one talking about how women should not be allowed to go on the internet without a male guardian present.

It amazes me how these people handle issues of this magnitude with such grace.
I mean, really?
That's what you want to talk about?

What will it take for these people to wake up?
It's not cute anymore.

Saudis will get me on this;

Why is everyone in this country so angry about the Dubai metro?

I know we're jealous of the progress the UAE has made, but really we need to stop hating.

ubergirl

What Do You Say in Your First Post in Over 4754.8 Years, Anyway?

2009-06-22T03:41:00.000-07:00

Hi.

Here's what's new:

I'm almost a graduate
I'm even more of a hippie than I used to be
I don't believe in "Obama the president" anymore
Don't get me wrong, I still think he's pretty fly
Actually, I don't believe politics can solve anything anymore
All we need is love <3

I'm sorry I've been away for so long, but I'm back now. For good. I hope.
If you're reading this, thank you for sticking with me and my drama <3

If it's your first time on my blog and you have no idea what I'm on about...

Hi.

ubergirl

I Can Never Properly Open Ketchup Packages

2009-03-12T14:24:00.001-07:00

I always make a mess.
Anyway.

Wtf is it with all the Octomom talk? Why is she news?
I am appalled that she made her way into Saudi newspapers.

Yesterday I met a girl (17-20 years old) who had never used the internet.
I was... Bewildered.
I mean, how? Why?

Also, follow me on twitter.

I had to.

ubergirl

Someone Should Have Told Me

2009-02-21T07:52:00.001-08:00

... You wing it, you FAIL.

Or maybe I should have known on my own.

Anyway. Good thing I'm not a quitter.

I'll be okay, right?

ubergirl

Bottle It Up

2009-02-02T03:47:00.000-08:00

I can't wait till I fucking graduate.

ubergirl

This is Actually Happening

2009-01-16T12:41:00.000-08:00

So the good people in Qatar want a meeting of Arab and Muslim nations to talk about what's going on in Gaza.
And a few days before that's set to happen, Saudi Arabia holds a meeting of its own, basically urging Arab and Muslim countries not to go to the summit in Qatar.

Meow!

I am getting total dejavu. This has happened before, I'm sure of it...
When, though?

Oh, right.
HIGH SCHOOL.

What the fuck?
Can't we, for once, shut the fuck up, and not embarrass me?

God damn it, only today 65 people died. And this is what we're doing.
Great job, governments of the world. Really.

ubergirl

Prayer is All You Can Give Them. (And Ofcourse, There's Always Sorcery...)

2009-01-04T13:25:00.000-08:00

I don't think I've ever been more selfish than I have these last two months. I have not been aware of anything that has gone on outside of my own head.
As a result, I have neglected everything from my school work to this blog, and I apologize.

I want the world to work. I really, really do. And, to a certain extent, I still do not understand why it doesn't. I might be young and naive, I might still have that wide-eyed, childlike view of the world, but for the life of me I don't get why we can't all just get along. I don't understand how casual violence and murder has become. And to be completely honest, I hope I never do.

And so, I reluctantly watched the news for the first time in two months, and it made me cry. Again.
Because people are dying, and in my country I am not allowed to stand in the street and hold up a sign. I am not given the right of silent, peaceful protest.

Please give blood to the injured in Gaza. There are blood drives in most hospitals in Riyadh, KFH among them.

May God be with them. May God give them strength. And may God forgive us all.

ubergirl

I Am Sorry, But This Is Hillarious!

2008-12-15T07:12:00.000-08:00

ubergirl

"... Don't Eat Food, 'Cause That Shit's Expensive!"

2008-12-01T06:22:00.000-08:00

I don't understand what happened in India?
Obviously we would never know who the group responsible was. The governments of the world, not just India, would refuse to publicize their cause.
So why do this? Thrill of the kill?
I'm tired of hearing "these people are probably oppressed and had no choice.."
I am sorry, but it is unnatural to be so ready to kill.
Why doesn't everyone just calm down? Just give the world one week of peace and God-damn quiet. I would love to turn on the news and hear: "Uhh... Ladies and gentlemen, not much is going on... Soo... Uhh... How 'bout reruns of Will and Grace?"
I'm tired of worrying about the number of casualties. Everywhere.
Also, can't everything be free for that one week, too? I mean, since we're on a roll...

ubergirl87

You Did It. He Did It. DAMN IT, WE DID IT!!!

2008-11-06T02:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I cried and cried and cried.
Because in this world there is a beautiful place where a man, whose father is from Kenya and whose mother is a working-class woman, can occupy the highest office in the land.
I believe in America again.
I know Barack Obama is no demigod, but I believe that he cares about the economical crisis and the environment. He recognizes that people are dying of hunger and that it should not be happening. He has family in Kenya, for fuck's sake!
... And he won. He is the most powerful man on the planet.

We are so proud of you yanks!

ubergirl

Reality: A Collective Hunch

2008-11-04T02:35:00.000-08:00

I don't know if this is true, but someone told me yesterday that the Grand Mufti, Shaikh Abulaziz AlShaikh announced yesterday that everyone who does not follow Al-Wahhab's teachings and 'reformations' is a kaffir (infidel.)
Oh, also, he said women must cover their entire bodies, and only show their left eye.

This while the world is going through the worst economical crisis in modern history.
This while a bag lady (the first I have ever seen in my 21 years of life in Riyadh) rummages through garbage cans.
This while there was a man who parked his car in a tunnel, took his cock out and pissed in the street. (Yes, I saw.)

How does he keep a straight face?

ubergirl

PS. RIP Madelyn Dunham.

All You Need is Love

2008-10-19T14:54:00.000-07:00

Love is all you need.

uberigrl87

Once Again I Will Abuse my Position and Exploit the People Who Email Me

2008-09-19T23:30:00.000-07:00

I was contacted by a gentleman outside of Arabia who was interested in chatting with me (about Arabia, I presumed.) Some time later, the man needed reminding as to whom I was and I told him to check his 'sent mail' folder.
****: do you have a blog or something, i usually add people to whom i thought i............. ok

7:49 AM so we have spoken, good........... so where we were ?

me: no we've never spoken

if you look in your sent mail folder

****: ok, let me

me: you'll find that you have sent me one email

7:50 AM ****: LOL, yes i found it

but that request was really nice, :)

7:51 AM me: sure

......
****: ok i found your blog, Saudi !!! OH ! ...............HAVE, A LOT OF MIXED FEELINGS :(

On what planet is that acceptable behavior? "I have a lot of mixed feelings about your country"
You know what?
If you send me an Email as peculiar as the one I received from this fellow, you're not allowed to have mixed feelings about anything. Those are reserved for well-mannered normal people.
I am sick of these racist idiots.

Go and have mixed feelings about me and my country men. I hope you drown in them. (In your mixed feelings, or in my countrymen. Both experiences are equally unpleasant and will do.)

ubergirl

Stream of Consciousness

2008-09-15T22:46:00.000-07:00

I am sorry I've been lazy with updates, but I'm afraid I'm feeling a bit depressed and uninspired.
I thought about blogging about a perverted bastard who is manipulating vulnerable women, but that's not news, is it?
So instead, I want to talk about something else. Anything else. Currently I'm not sure what I could say that would go on for more than a sentence, but I'm sure I'll come up with something. Any minute now.
I wonder why bees in Europe are big and fuzzy?
I am developing an irrational fear of cats. I think it's my other irrational fear (of rabies. Shut up. It's very dangerous, you know.) that is fueling this, more recent, fear of cats.
The weird thing is, I used to have a cat. Never bothered me.
I really need to get a flight to Jeddah but there are absolutely none and the airline people are all but shouting "AAHAAAHAA! JEDDAH? THIS WEEK? YOU'RE FUCKING JOKING. YOU'RE MORE LIKELY TO CATCH A ROCKET SHIP TO THE MOON AND HAVE BONBONS UP THERE WITH... I DON'T KNOW... FUCKING BONO! HAHA NO WAAY LADY!"
And they'd say it like that, all in caps.
It's a bit of a medical emergency, you could say. So it would really be great if I could go. I guess I'm not going.
That really is unfortunate. I don't understand why the airlines don't quadruple their flights to Jeddah during Ramadhan? (People flock to Jeddah because you can only get to Mecca through there, and Ramadhan is a holy month and people often go there to pray and things.)
Some families go every Ramadhan. I don't understand why they can't pray in their houses and let people with medical emergencies get on with their lives?
Does anyone want to lend me their private jet?

ubergirl

لا تنسى أخاك ترعاه يداك لا تنسى أخاااااك لو سرقت منا الأيام قلبا معطاء بسام لن نستسلم للآلام لن نستلم لللآلام

2008-09-01T07:49:00.000-07:00

I am feeling festive this Ramadhan!!!!

Ramadhan kareem!! Have an exceptional month, everybody!

(And you all have my permission to turn the comments section into a Bab AlHara discussion board)

Love and peace!

ubergirl

PS. Mona got a bit carried away with the title. (I let her pick)

Do Not Worry the Wildlife

2008-08-12T11:32:00.000-07:00

It is so ironic that the person who has always told me never to completely trust anyone ended up screwing me over unbelievably.

How do I know if it's made me bitter?

I met the most random person a couple of days ago. Pharrell Williams!

He has the most amazing skin I have ever seen.

He wears makeup, right? He has to. He looks like a wax figure.

Okay I've been playing around with this damn Mac and I can't figure out how to crop the photo, so you'll have to wait to see photographic evidence of the hotness that is Pharrell (I swear his complexion is unnatural.. )

A few days ago a man told me "Arabs are racists who have too much money for their own good."

Well, that's news to me.

I'd appreciate it if someone directed me to the people who give out the cheques for being arrogant and Arabic?

The Olympics are all over the place, and the media is hating on China like anything.

China must be so pissed. Can you imagine throwing a big party only to have your guests criticize everything you've ever done? Man I'd just kick everyone out.

And with so many skeletons in its closet, why did China even want to host the Olympics? That's just asking for trouble.

ubergirl

"... Darwin Was No Ordinary Mother Fucker.."

2008-08-10T12:52:00.000-07:00

I love the world and all that's in it, because it's special and magical.

Today I saw a rainbow. And I fell in love with the world all over again <3

ubergirl

This is Just... Profound. (I'm Not Being Sarcastic, I Swear)

2008-07-27T16:01:00.000-07:00

"There are days." - Nayef, aged 2.

It is abstract in its wisdom.
Seriously. Think about it. There are days. There are days.
Wow.

ubergirl87

Segregation

2008-07-07T15:40:00.000-07:00

"For God's sake... They're only human beings! They won't devour you!" - My father, upon my hesitation to enter a room full of screaming, sweaty men marked (you guessed it): "NO WOMEN ALLOWED."

How dramatic are the Wahhabis?
To this very second I do not understand the idea of separate areas for 'singles' (men) and 'families' (women are not officially allowed to go anywhere alone, they must be accompanied by a male guardian at all times. That law is, of course, flouted and largely ignored.)

It's a public place for God's sake. What are they afraid of? Public fornication?
I want to go out have have some damn ice cream somewhere nice and airy. Not in some cramped little room that smells like feet.
And what if I want to seduce the mens, anyway? That's my goddamn business.
What is the purpose of this segregation? They will never trick anyone into thinking that the opposite sex does not exist.
If they don't want to see any women they should stay at home and knit, or something. Ditto for the women who don't want to see any men.
I don't see why I should suffer for this sickness.

You'd think we're walking around in bikinis. They have us in head to toe black. If anyone finds Abayas seductive, they should seek psychological help immediately.
They all need to get out more. And lighten the hell up!

ubergirl

Hmmm...

2008-06-18T14:21:00.000-07:00

Take a look at this, and ignore the fact that I seem to be getting my pseudo political news off Perezhilton.com.

I cannot believe how shallow these women are. Barack Obama does not care about your religious views, and he certainly does not care that you choose to wear a headscarf.
It baffles me how slow some people are. And how inconsiderate. What would the Republicans do with a picture of Barack Obama addressing a bunch of women wearing hijabs? Even worse, a bunch of volunteers wearing hijabs?
Fucking sauté him, that's what.

You know, that's what I hate most about people. Fake outrage and "fighting" for non-causes. You wanna be a good Muslim? Tell the media about what's happening in Somalia. In fact, tell everyone Somalia is being mean to you because you wear a headscarf. Go crazy.
Draw some attention to people who actually need it.
I have no problem with that kind of cause. Saving lives and ending poverty.
But to go around claiming a man who is a minority himself, discriminates against you based on some bullshit excuse, is well, bullshitty. (I made that word up. Clever!)
I don't think there's anything wrong with wearing a hijab, and I certainly don't think Barack Obama sees anything wrong with it, but most of America does. So if you really care about Obama becoming president, shut your pie-hole and go sit in the back if you have to.
It won't make you no Rosa Parks either, missy.
Petty people with their petty causes. Drives me crazy. Another one for the Denmark archives (which is still goin' strong, by the way. WOHOO!)

ubergirl

Get Your Act Together

2008-06-07T04:15:00.000-07:00

Backstabbing never felt this good.

ubergirl

What Do You Think?

2008-05-27T02:54:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking, you know the crazy religious people? The ones who have joined the cult that can legally shout in the streets and harrass poor unknowing citizens? The high-up folks who announce that the Shia in Lebanon are kuffar? (Which, by the way, is my new favorite word. Kaffir. It's so dramatic and final-sounding. Sexy!)
Back to what I was saying. These crazy religious people, are they really religious? I mean, do they believe God aproves of their antics?
They do realize they just a political tool, I'm sure. So if they know this, do they still think what they're doing is what Islam asks of them?
Now bear with me, if they don't believe what they're doing is based on Islam, does this mean they don't believe in Islam?
I realize we can't generalize, but tell me what you think. I really would love to survvey them, but obviously, I can't.
This is the next best thing.
What do you think?

ubergirl

Poor Richard Quest

2008-05-23T16:42:00.000-07:00

I feel really bad for people who lose their careers over some messed up shit that no-one should have found out about.

I know this happened ages ago, but I can't stop thinking about him. And pitying him.
Does anyone think we'll ever see him on TV again? Maybe on Larry King? A tell-all book, perhaps?

Anything?

ubergirl

Fish Give Me a Weird Vibe Now

2008-05-13T08:28:00.000-07:00

A while ago I had a nightmare about fish in the toilet that bite your butt if you're not careful, spreading gross fish venom all through your bloodstream, slowly killing you.
I have very disturbing dreams.

Oh, and just for kicks:You're welcome!

ubergirl

New Post

2008-05-04T05:49:00.000-07:00

Skype is like magic.

Anyway.
I've been obsessed with Sheikh Muhammed bin Rashid AlMaktoum of Dubai for about a month now.
He's so nice to everyone.
And look at what he's done with Dubai.

Why can't that be us?
It's frustrating.

My mother said the other day that when she was in her teens they used to tease Emaratis and laugh at them and call them garawa (villagers) and Bedouins.

Guess who the fuck's laughing now?

And I am very, very angry.
Because they have security and good healthcare and no poverty and sexy turbans and phenomenal technology. And their own theme music!
Oh, and they have a hot piece of sheikh: Click to enlarge

We have people getting away with rape, and people living in poverty, and orphans living among cockroaches, and this:

How's that for theme music, bitches?

It is very sad when people refer to AlFaisaliyah and AlMamlaka :

As the height of technology in Saudi Arabia. And the worst part is, they brag about them.

In Dubai, I wear whatever I want and no-one has ever said or done anything to me. In Riyadh I am in my black abaya and I get verbally harassed by ill-disciplined teenage boys and Muttawas, and apparently, the law does not protect me from this harassment.
In Dubai, people drink, but I have never seen a drunk person there. In Riyadh, I found an empty bottle of liquor outside my little sister's school.

And I hate people who say "oh, but we have Islaaaaam. We practice Islam! We're much better off."
Practice Islam? Where?
Show me where we practice Islam and I will die happy.

We are a nation of contradictions, and it seems as though we are proud. Or in denial.
Pick your poison.

ubergirl

PS. Fouad AlFarhan has been released!

Life

2008-04-24T06:20:00.000-07:00

I saw a dead man lying on the side of the street today. I have yet to react.

I had never seen a dead body before.

It was a hit and run.
Cars should be banned.

ubergirl

Hello, Children...

2008-04-12T02:51:00.000-07:00

Why do men wear speedos?

Don't they know how ridiculous they look?

And most importantly, when will it END?

ubergirl

"Patriotism is supporting your country all the time,

2008-04-05T13:45:00.000-07:00

... and your government when it deserves it." - Mark Twain

I have gone a whole two days without a driver and I am deeply depressed.
We need to solve this, like, yesterday.

Am I disloyal and truly unpatriotic for wanting to just leave Saudi Arabia?

ubergirl

Random Picture Post

2008-03-29T09:39:00.000-07:00

Just because I don't have anything to blog about.

I pass by this building almost everyday on my way back from college. Any guesses as to what that scribble on the wall means? (Taqwa I expect you to get this right, ya ba66a.) (Taken on 4/11/2007)

Random picture I took at the book fair. It is not a coincidence that the people who happened to be there when I took the shot are all men. There were about 20 women, tops the day I went. The man in the picture overhead is a writer, Hamad Al-Jasser. They named all the aisles after famous Saudi writers. Isn't that cute? (6/3/2008)

This was taken at one of my favorite places in the world. Literally where I spent most of my childhood. (16/11/2007)

I took this while I was walking into our house. I happened to look up, and the clouds made a beautiful pattern. It's sad to think of all the other patterns I missed because I rarely take the time to go outside and look at nature and shit. (23/11/2007)

Doodles on a desk at college. I told you this was gonna be random. (28/10/2007)

Take a close look at this one...

It's a chick! I was at a traffic light when I noticed these kids playing with a baby chick. So sweet. And incredibly random. (28/11/2007)

I was looking at this police car and it didn't make me feel any safer. In fact, it made me feel uneasy. The police force in Riyadh (and the fire department) are barely trained and ill equipped to handle anything. (28/3/2007)

I took these this afternoon. I just thought they make Riyadh look pretty. (29/3/2008)

ubergirl

Now THIS is Blasphemy!:

2008-03-25T14:27:00.000-07:00

Anyway.

So I promised a rundown of the Q&A with the president of King Saud University, and I think I'd better deliver before I forget the juicy details.

He got a lot of questions about summer programs (which we don't have.)

Now this really pisses me off, because EVERY YEAR we are asked to sign up for the summer program at the secretary's office, and every fucking year they only get a handful of signatures, and they scratch the whole plan, because it's stupid to open the whole school for the summer just for a handful of students in every department.
And I am happy to say, for once, KSU chooses not to do something stupid.

I am beginning to think these people asking for the summer term generally enjoy complaining about things that don't necessarily bother them. Either that or they are the handful of people that sign up, and who happen to be unbelievably loud and obnoxious.

Of course the prez said they'll "look into it", which I hope is code for "Either sign your damn name or shut the fuck up. Now go sit down. Jeez."

A good question was one about the weird 12 PM rule we have at the girl's university. Basically girls cannot leave the university before 12 PM. I really have given up trying to understand this rule, (imposed on us by the Muttawas.)
Don't even try. There is not an explanation. They just like toying with us.
His answer was "we'll try and make it so that all your classes end after 12." Which, I have to admit was the only bullshit answer of the event.
You take a job as the president of our university, and I must say, you seem like a smart guy. You know this rule is complete nonsense. Isn't it your job to defend us, to at least represent us fairly and publicly oppose this rule, instead of giving in to the mutts?
There are many rules made by the Muttawas that King Saud University completely ignores. Such as the fifteen minute prayer-time break that I certainly have never gotten.
We can ignore ridiculous rules when we want to, Mr.Prez. Why the hell not this one?

One girl made a very passionate comment about how students with certain connections get things done easier, and that some teachers are mean and conceited. She raises good points, but suffice it to say I am not impressed by easy applause lines. Mr.AlOthman was outraged, of course. He does not approve of this behaviour and he assured us that it would be dealt with, and I believe him.

My favorite was a pharmaceutical student who talked about how after graduating he has to wait six months for the place where he's supposed to sign up for training to open and can't the University do something about that? He went on about other stuff, but I liked his questions most because they're real problems. Mr.Prez said he really can't do anything about that because it wasn't to do with the University... and I daydreamed a little here, I must say.
Anyway it was a good answer.

A man in a wheelchair asked why they wouldn't let him into medical school (he's doing engineering.) The gist of what the President (politely) said is that we must all pursue careers where we are guaranteed a job, and that the guy's medical condition may not allow him to go into medicine, but they will certainly allow him to be an exceptional engineer. All we need is hard work, and bla bla...
And that got me thinking. I have never seen a doctor in a wheel chair. Not even on TV.
Does anyone know more about this?

That's really all I can remember.

ubergirl

Randomness Part.. 603?

2008-03-17T14:44:00.000-07:00

I like the prez of our university. He's pretty cool. He adressed us all on Sunday and we got to ask questions and everything. It was great.
Am I a complete loser for reading David Sedaris?:

Guilty pleasure: Pride and Prejudice.
".. the most determined flirt that ever made her family ridiculous." Classic. Makes me laugh like anything.
I miss playing in the sand.
I miss playing in the mud.
I don't undertand the early settlers? Why did they move into the middle of the desert? I mean, it's fine now, with airconditioning and bottled water, but at the time... What the hell were they thinking? Maybe they were some weird suicide cult that wanted to die of thirst and hunger but failed miserably? It's so weird.

ubergirl

My Biggest Fear

2008-03-13T08:22:00.000-07:00

Seriously this shit creeps me out:

Amy Winehouse (AMI WINKHAUSE) version:

ubergirl

A Bunch of Hooey

2008-03-06T01:28:00.000-08:00

I read this in the paper yesterday:

"The 'commitittee' Anticipates Women's Day at the Janadriya."

I don't quite understand?

1. Women are not some sort of disease. Why must our arrival be anticipated and prepared for?:

"Oh my God. THE WOMEN ARE COMING!"

"Damn it, AGAIN? Go get your shots everyone... No-one is immune. We must be prepared."

Enough with the drama. Can't we just fucking show up without all the hoopla?

2. I thought this was a 'cultural event.' Why are the Muttawas involved?

WHY ARE THEY ALWAAAAAAAAAAAAYS INVOOOOOOOOOLVED?

It's the damn Janadriya. They talk about it like it's an orgy.
Trust me, it's not.

Not that I'm going.

I'll only ever go when the Muttawas are not part of the 'cultural experience.'

ubergirl

May The Lord Have Mercy on Our Souls

2008-03-01T05:45:00.000-08:00

68 People are dead in Gaza, and 200 are injured.

And I keep getting asked to sign some e-petition to get the pictures of the prophet off wikipedia.

You want to talk about a fucking 'conspiracy against Muslims'?

How about when people are dying in the hundreds every day, all we seem to be able to focus on is a cartoonist in Denmark.
You're in on the fucking "conspiracy"!!!
You're fueling it.

ubergirl

Muslim Garb is SEXAI.

2008-02-27T03:24:00.000-08:00

I don't understand how this would offend Barack Obama?

It is shocking that anything related to Arabs or Islam is viewed as a negative thing.

People forget that the 'terrrists' are a minority.

I am offended that anyone would find this damaging to a reputation.

I think it's pretty fucking sexy.

ubergirl

Boreidah = LOVE

2008-02-24T13:08:00.000-08:00

News from my favorite (I'm serious) part of the country.

Some folks in Boreidah (tell me if i spelt it wrong) are going around painting over pictures of advertisements, and apparently there's some sort of election going on, and the candidates are pissed because their pictures are being vandalized as well.

This is all because some people believe that Islam forbids creating images of faces because it's like trying to recreate God's work.

Yeah. I don't really get it either.

What on earth would we do for comedy if it weren't for the good people of Boreidah?

I'm serious. These people are like cartoon characters.

ubergirl

Curiouser and Curiouser!

2008-02-21T15:40:00.001-08:00

Don Imus got fired for calling people 'nappy headed hos', but Bill O'Reilly can say he doesn't want to go on 'a lynching party against Michelle Obama' and there's no outrage?

Huh?

I'm confused.

When someone in the family is on their death bed it is nerve racking.
Sitting at a table having dinner and the phone rings. The room goes quiet and people stare at eachother.
One person slowly gets up and walks over to the phone.
"Allah yistur."
"Na'am?"

Silence.

Everyone around inhales slowly, and then...

Sighs with relief when whoever is on the phone smiles and nods, indicating that we can go back to our meals.
No mourning.
For today.

And all I want to do is quote Sweeney Todd: "Life is for the alive, my dear!"
Yes, in song.

ubergirl

One Day...

2008-02-15T14:21:00.000-08:00

I will arrive at the Riyadh airport from a great holiday and not wish I were back at the beach.
One day, I will be absolutely, one zillion percent happy (or even relieved) to be home.

ubergirl

Tarja Halonen

2008-02-10T13:24:00.000-08:00

Arabic media has been paying a lot of attention to the American presidential race.
Particularly to the democrats.

A big issue here is that a woman cannot lead a country. No one says this outright, of course.
They don't want people to think they're not modern.

It's more in the tones. The body language.

When I called a friend on it a few weeks ago, she admitted that she thought women were good at some things, men at other things (like leading a country.)
Typical nonsense from an unexpected source.
People never cease to surprise me.

"What about the president of Finland?" I asked.
She is a woman, after all. I can't say I know much about her presidency, but surely she is more of a successful leader than, say, all of the Arab leaders combined? Times 92384934728394721 squared?

Also, she famously resembles my main man, Conan O'Brien, making her all the more capable of successfully running a country.

Anyway.

It angers me how brainwashed our people are. It is 2008 and our educated 20 year olds do not think a woman can run a country.
Their argument is, if we are all truly equal, then why were we created differently? Why are there male and female human beings? Because we are suited to different roles.

Uhh.... No.

We were created looking differently because life is one. big. fucking. TEST.
It is a test to see who will use those differences as a way to divide everyone, and claim superiority (and inferiority, sisters. You contribute to this too.)
That is also why there are black people and white people and Asian people and brown people. Because this is a test to see who will choose to be racist and judge people on what they look like. Or what their genitalia looks like.
And it looks like many of my countrymen are failing this test miserably.
Thay fail to see the bigger picture; that we are more alike than we are different.

That being said, I have to say I'm on the Barack Obama bandwagon.
And you'd all best follow suit.

ubergirl

Organized Religion Makes Me Uneasy

2008-01-27T13:37:00.001-08:00

A friend showed me a forum where a somewhat famous and respected sheik issues fatwas on things like threesomes and smoking marijuana.

It saddens me to think that the majority of the people I meet feel the need to seek a sheik's approval of every intimate detail of their lives. For some reason they do not trust themselves to make any kind of judgement, or they distrust their ability to research matters on their own and come to their own conclusions.
These shaikhs capitalize on every one's vulnerability, and their "fatwas" are sometimes nothing more than opinions that have no basis in Islam. And if you tell anybody this they will think you are "some sort of atheist."

I think I am "some sort of being that posses at least one working brain cell."

If you go to these forums, you will see that all of the questions are from people who have probably asked 3294834 sheiks the same question, and might very well go on to ask 32897432894 sheiks the same question, looking for the answer they want.

Very often they are horny old men who are looking for someone to justify their want of... Perverse... Things.
Like the threesome question?

السؤال: إذا كان الرجل متزوج من أكثر من زوجة ، هل يجوز أن يجتمع زوجتين ـ مثلا ـ للمداعبة في نفس الوقت ، أو أن يجامع واحدة والأخرى ترى ذلك أو يداعبها أمام الأخرى ، أو يطلب من زوجيته التعري أمامه ويمارسهم معاً ؟
الجواب : يجوز مداعبتها معاً ولكن لا يجوز تعريتهما لعدم جواز نظر كل منهم إلى عورة الأخرى.

So basically, you can do whatever you want as long as your women keep their eyes closed.
You know, so there's a sense of modesty.

These are the kinds of examples that make a mockery of religion in general.

Faith is a beautiful thing. Religion is a beautiful thing. Sacred. Glorious.
How dare these people invade it in this manner?

We should all stop giving these people a podium.

It is disgusting that while there is a humanitarian crisis in Gaza, the Moral Police are on forums and at their dinner tables preaching about how it is a disgrace that women can rent their own hotel rooms now without the permission of their male guardian.
And many many people blindly mimic this opinion, because someone "more knowledgeable in Islamic law" told them so.

Stop listening to these people. You be the judge.
Who on earth knows your faith, your religion, better than yourself?

Organized religion is what takes the soul out of believers.
Let's just put a stop to it.

ubergirl

Let's Try and Put Things Into Perspective...

2008-01-16T16:04:00.000-08:00

I was listening to some people complain about how we Saudis are mistreated in airports all over the world. Going through extra security and having to take off our shoes and answer to rude Europeans about why we're in their country when all we're doing is throwing our money at them and they should be happy about us and anyway, isn't this racist?

I understand why most (probably all) of Saudi Arabia is offended by this treatment.
Don't worry, I am not going to argue that we deserve it because of our evil ways.
(You know, how we enjoy blowing things up.)

I actually think we deserve it for another reason: Karma.

I'll get straight to the point: How horribly do we treat our foreign help?
I'm talking about drivers, maids, Indian construction workers...
And not only are they treated appallingly at airports, but everywhere else.

What we Saudis put them through is torture. I am shocked at how this goes... Not unnoticed; I think people certainly notice it, but what is shocking is how this is acceptable.
We have these people working outside in the July sun for hours on end, when it is illegal to have anyone working in that kind of heat.
And what they are payed is shocking. I heard that on average these people make four hundred riyals a month, that's roughly one hundred and six dollars.
And that is not all. That's probably not even the worst of it!

We have treated them this way for decades.
And we see nothing wrong with this.
And then we wonder why we are treated like the scum of the earth all over the world.

I just wonder why it took so damn long for it all to catch up to us.
I mean, we have missed a huge chance to make up for the mistreatment of our foreign help! HUGE!

I am deeply, deeply ashamed of this.
I think these workers are incredible.
Think of all the hardship they have had to endure in their lives. Compare it to being searched a bunch of times at an airport, what we are complaining of.
Now think of how many of them there are. You probably see dozens of them everyday. You pass them without so much as a smile or a nod, to show your gratitude.
And then we have gone on to play the victim, not even acknowledging what we have done to deserve mistreatment.
Shame on us.

What happened to having perspective?
Where are all the smart people?
Why aren't they on TV telling everyone that they are idiots if all they care about is how rude the customs people are at Heathrow?

After spending twenty years on this earth, I am still confused.
Why don't we all just be nice to everyone? Having empathy is really not that difficult.

ubergirl

Free Fouad!

2008-01-08T19:14:00.000-08:00

I have recently learned that a Saudi blogger, Fouad AlFarhan, has spent almost a month in jail.

Get him back to his kids, for God's sake.

Freedom of speech sounds pretty darn good right about now.

ubergirl

Is It Just Me Or...

2008-01-08T18:35:00.000-08:00

... Is Barack Obama kind of sexy?

I know. He's a politician and they're icky.

He seems genuine, though.

Madri.

I guess I got a crush on Obama.
Original, I know.

I want a democracy toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I'm so jealous.

ubergirl

Benazir Bhutto

2007-12-30T06:28:00.000-08:00

I don't understand how people commit murder.
All our lives are sacred.
How can anyone plan someone else's murder?
Does life mean nothing to them?
It is sacred!

It's bad enough that we have incurable fatal diseases... But to purposely kill people on top of that?

I cannot come to grips with the thought that people can benefit from others' deaths.

Human beings are so crude.

I don't get it. She was a good person.
She wasn't done living.

ubergirl

LOL

2007-12-17T14:53:00.000-08:00

PS. Scroll down a bit for an update on the Qatif girl situation.

ubergirl

VICTORY!

2007-12-17T05:00:00.000-08:00

The Qatif Girl was granted leniency.
ZERO Lashes and NO jail time.

This is attributed to the pressures of the Western media on the Saudi government, and I am honestly happy about this. I'd rather the West pressure us into justice rather than wait for the idiots in charge of all this to figure it out.

But I am not celebrating yet...

ubergirl

Fatat AlQatif

2007-11-30T06:46:00.000-08:00

I cannot say how much I want to give this girl a hug and tell her how brave she is. I have avoided reading about this and even talking about it for the longest time, because (and I am being completely selfish here, I know) it will tear me up inside.
I don't know if I can take any more of this.
My God, I can't imagine what she is feeling.

May God bless her lawyer and her husband. What wonderful men.

Now I want to move on to the crazy people who are running the courts and, for that matter, the entire fucking country.
How great is it that we have the Moral Police making these serious judgments and slandering innocent women?
I would just like to point out to people who think hers was a fair ruling according to Islam, that there is no such thing as 100 lashings in Islamic law. It's either 80 lashings for an unmarried adulterer, or stoning for a married one.
In both cases the person must admit to adultery and there must be 4 witnesses to the act itself.
That, in a nutshell, is what Islam has to say about adultery, which Fatat AlQuatif did not, by the way, commit.
Here is what I make of the whole situation: The Moral Police (about 70% of the population who either basically think they are morally superior to every one, or think their Sheik of choice is) who convicted this woman are only doing this because she is a shiite.

That is all I have to say.

ubergirl

Dumbledore Likes The Boys

2007-10-23T04:34:00.000-07:00

Some girls at school make the weirdest excuses. And the teachers let this slide.

"I'm sorry, Doctor, if you keep us late to try and help us get what we're here for in the first place - you know, a piece of paper that says I'm qualified to have a career but means absolutely nothing else - my husbaaaaaaaaaaand won't like it. He wants me home by 12."

Sometimes, just the word "zoojiii" (my husbaaaaand) will do the trick.

?

I really don't understand how this is an excuse. It is a random fact. Like how I like the color yellow. I might as well use that as an excuse next time.

"I'm sorry I'm twenty minutes late for class, professor. It's just that my love for the color yellow distracts me sometimes and I lose track of time."
And she will have this coy smile on her face as she nods, welcoming me into class. You know, like she does with the married hos.
Yes, I said hos.
I am angry at them hos. Grrr.

There are many reasons why "I'm married" is not an excuse (apart from the obvious) infact, it actually helps to be married and in school:

1) If you are married and still in school, this would mean you probably do not have kids (or atleast kids that need a driver to take them to school), and might have your own driver and car to pick you up late in the afternoon, whereas I, who am lucky enough to have a driver, have to litterally perform a miracle every morning (and sometimes every afternoon) to get to school on time. There are four other people who need the driver, and three destinations in all. Every morning.

2) For people who do not have drivers, they have to rely on their brothers (who are probably rarely cooperative) to take them to and from school. Or, their fathers can take them. Now, at the age of 20, our fathers are not as young as my classmate's husbands probably are. It is hard for my father to drive me to or from school in this heat, on those reods, and in that traffic! Whereas these girl's husbands are probably much younger and can handle that torture.

3) If your husband does not respect your need to get an education, you should stay at home. I am now beyond saying I think men should respect their wives' need to be educated and bla bla... because quite frankly I have lost almost all hope in our men ever waking up from their deluded state of sexism superiority complexes. At this point I'm just waiting for this generation to die out and hoping the next one is any better. If you want equality in your household be fucking smart and do not marry a sexist. It is that simple. If you do not listen to me, and you go ahead and marry the bastard, you are an idiot that does not deserve an education. So stay at home and make the man some damn kabsa.

4) In my honest opinion, if you are married at the age of 18 or 19, and have a child that you need to get home to or whatever, that is your problem. I do not mean to be cruel, but having a child while you are still at school is irresponsible, and it is these girls' own burden to bear. I shouldn't have to be forced to spend seven hours at school and take a 3PM class because the (dellusional) faculty feel obligated to put all the married girls in earlier class so that they can get back to their husbands and kids earlier. I'm not saying put them in the later classes, I'm saying do not make their convenience the number one priority.

5) What on earth does your husband want with you at 12 in the afternoon? Now, this is not an actual point, but I am genuinely curious to see what answers these people can come up with.

More on this later.
ubergirl

God Bless YouTube

2007-10-09T05:39:00.000-07:00

Click Here.

How much do you love this guy?

Ramadan is almost over. Wasn't it wonderful?
Something is bugging me though. I do not like people who are only pious during Ramadan. And I especially don't like the way people tell eachother to read the Quraan as fast as they can, so that they can squeeze as many readings as possible during Ramadan.
Am I the only person who thinks the Quraan should be savoured?

ubergirl

We Don't Have Gay People in Saudi Arabia Either, By The Way...

2007-09-28T01:11:00.000-07:00

Things that annoy me:

1. People who stand around and hold long conversations in cramped hallways and doorways.
SHUT. THE HELL. UP. AND MOVE!
Or one day, I will poke you in the eye.

2. Nimr Bin 3Adwan. Did he, or did he not, shoot his wife? Make up your damn minds, historians.

3. Khalid Hossieni. What a cheese ball.
The Kite Runner is mediocre at best. All this guy does is give you a character that is all-good, and then suddenly he has him murdered, and there you are, crying, thinking you're reading a 'touching' story, when really he is only toying with your emotions and making you cry to fool you into thinking his book is good.
I don't understand what the deal is with this overrated crap people call literature.
I am completely against literary snobbery, and I literally will read anything, but if you're gonna over-hype something, atleast make it good.

4. People (*cough*al3awa6'i*cough*) who have a whole hour of television air-time, and instead of directing fellow Muslims' gazes towards the less fortunate, (which is, you know, the whole point of fasting..) they spend their hour whining about homosexuality.
There have always been, and there will always be homosexuals on this earth. Get over it.
I don't understand how these people can bear to live with themselves.
You have an hour on television where you can talk to people about whatever you want, and you get people who will trust, and even blindly follow, your advice. Can you imagine having that sort of power?
I mean, this is a huge responsibility. And apparently these people have no sense of its gravity.

Contrary to popular belief, I don't think Allah will punish us for not exterminating the faggotry. I think God will punish the people who get an hour of television to address the richest Muslims in the world and waste it on hating the gays, when there are people in Somalia who have nothing to break their fast.
There are people in Saudi Arabia who have nothing to break their fast! And instead of helping them, we waste our money on shopping for green articles of clothing to wear on the national day.
You know, to celebrate our love for our country.
Love for our country my a**. (It's Ramadan and I will not swear <3.)

Give to the poor. They're f***ing starving.

ubergirl

<3

2007-09-20T14:33:00.000-07:00

Spread the love!

ubergirl

Ramadan Kareem!

2007-09-12T18:15:00.000-07:00

I really wanted this to be a happy Ramadan post.
I really did.

But somehow, my fellow Muslims have found a way to make me angry. Again.

First of all I need to announce to the world (and not for the first time,) that I love the Shea.
I am outraged at how some Sunnis treat them.

There are rumours that the Shea think they can get to heaven by killing a Sunni, and that they only befriend Sunnis to "convert" them..
These rumours are false.
I know a few Shiite girls, and they are quite pleasant at worst.
In fact, when we are assigned group work in class, I try very hard to make sure I work with only Shiite girls.
They are incredibly dedicated, they take their work seriously, they work hard and they are always on time. In addition to them being polite, and an absolute joy to be around.
Many of the Sunni girls I have worked with turned out to be the exact opposite.
What is strange is that the Sunni girls feel superior to the Shea.
Baffling.

And now, I think, here comes Ramadan. A month when all of the Muslims in the world forget about their petty differences and focus on how the hungry and the poor suffer.
We will all unite, be respectful of each other, and for this one holy month, try to pretend to be nice.

But who needs nice?
Being rude and disrespectful is much more bad ass.

Apparently there is a Kuwaiti show that will air in Ramadan, the month of peace, that criticizes the Shea.

I start to type something to follow the previous sentence, but I keep erasing it.
I am so livid, I cannot put it into words.

I love the Shea. I love all Muslims.
In fact, I love all human beings.
No one is superior to anyone else.
I just wish we could all compromise and stop killing each other.
You think I am being naive.
Fine, I'll give you that.

But just for this month, people, be nice. To everyone!:
The annoying neighbors whose guests double park in front of your car.
The cleaning lady at school (a smile and a thank you would suffice, you have no idea how rarely these people get them.)
Your family.
Your pets.
And last but not least, let us not forget the people whom Ramadan was meant to remind us of: The needy.

Try being nice, just for Ramadan. See how it changes you, and when it does, maybe then we can call a truce with our Shea brothers and sisters.

And it will be totally sexy.

ubergirl

P.S. If you write anything hateful about the Shea in the comments section, I will delete it.
I will not tolerate hatefulness in Ramadan.

And We're Back

2007-09-03T17:05:00.000-07:00

I have recently begun keeping a promise I made to myself a very long time ago. I told myself I would always be completely honest with everyone.
Not because I wanted to better myself, or anything. Keeping up with the list of what lie you told who is exhausting work.

Anyway, honest answers is what I must always give, even when asked about something that I have very different opinions on than most of the "moral" majority.

And you know what?
I hate when people give me looks like they think I'm either out of my mind, or on the "kuffar's" side.
I hate when I am treated or spoken to like some kind of closeted atheist or something. I hate it.

I think most people who adhere to what is commonly called "Islam" (and what I openly call "farce") are either very naive, or just plain stupid. They listen to what this sheikh said about so and so, and what that sheikh thinks about such and such, without ever thinking that maybe they should form their own opinion on the matter.
I think people rely far too much on others some unknown entity (certainly not God) deemed knowledgeable, without ever questioning or thinking for themselves. I have said this 4897532097 times (okay, maybe four times): I think we have been blessed with the ability to think for a reason, and that reason is not to blindly follow some body else's instruction on religion.

It baffles me how I am considered lacking real Iman, when it is I who refuses to hand over my faith to a random "sheikh" by mimicking his opinions on everything.

So yeah, I think people who blindly follow these sheikhs are either naive or stupid, but I do not make them feel inferior. I don't look at them like they have some sort of disease. I am polite, and I answer all of their questions without ever criticizing their choices or saying anything mean.

I just don't understand why they think I don't deserve the same courtesy.

ubergirl

Summer... Lovin'?

2007-08-01T11:58:00.000-07:00

Anyway.
I'm on vacation. No internet access. A surprisingly good thing.
I hope you're all happy!
Have a great summer!

ubergirl

PS. Deathly Hallows. Discuss.

PPS/PSS (I forget). I loved it. Also, spoilers in the comment section! You have been warned!

An Open Letter To The Fanatics

2007-07-03T07:30:00.000-07:00

Fellow Muslims,

Leave. Salman. Rushdie. Alone.

Why do you people care that his book is blasphemous?
He doesn't like AlRasool.
..So?
He is entitled to his own opinion!

What really bothers me, is those of you who are annoyed with how Arabs and Muslims are always the bad guys in movies, but support those who want Salman Rushdi executed!

Why?

May I remind everyone, (or inform them), that according to Islam, if you are born Muslim, and decide to, well, not be a Muslim anymore, you should not be executed. Only if you are Muslim by choice, can you be punished for changing your religion.
So calling for his execution is sheer fanaticism and blind rage.

May I also remind those who still think it is right for Muslims to be marching for his death and issuing fatwas demanding it, that Somalia is still the most poverty-stricken country in the world.

Instead of us pulling together to stop our Somali brothers and sisters from dying of hunger, we all choose to focus on a man whom we wish to murder, therfore shifting more people's attention to him and helping him sell more and more books.

What, do you people like death in general?

All this really does show your devotion to AlRasool and his people. Shouting in the streets and declaring your hatred for Salman Rushdie at the dinner table.
Really.

You disgust me.

ubergirl

By the way, meet seven year old Mohamed:

He lives in Somalia.
In 2006, he spent two months at a clinic run by the French relief agency Doctors Without Borders. He was treated by a British doctor.
It's good that the French have time to waste on the poor, seeing as we have more important matters to deal with like hiring hitmen for Salman Rushdie and others who we believe are hell-bound.

WHY IN THE WORLD ISN'T THE MINISTRY OF HEALTH ALL OVER THIS!?

2007-06-15T15:30:00.000-07:00

Who the fucking hell runs that fucking shit hole?
That's what I fucking want to know.

It all started when my father told me to watch out for weird looking ants, because he read in the paper that they found poisonous ones here in Riyadh. A breed of poisonous black ants that almost killed a woman.
That's all the article said.
I asked him if there was someone from the health ministry I could call for more inforamtion, he said "not that I know of."
I asked a million times if there was more detail in the article, he said no.
It is shoking to me that the Ministry of Health did not issue a statement, atleast describing the ant, or telling us it's name.

I googled and this is what I found on a message board:

حذر الأستاذ الدكتور محمد بن صالح الخليفة عضو هيئة التدريس بقسم علم الحيوان في كلية العلوم بجامعة الملك سعود من لسعة النمل الأسود (السمسوم) والتي قد تؤدي إلى موت الشخص لما تحتويه من مواد ذات آثار سامة ومسببة للحساسية.

وقال: تعتبر من أكثر المركبات تعقيداً من ناحية تركيبة الكيميائي والذي لا زال يحتاج كثيراً من البحث والتقصي مضيفاً إلى ان دخولها إلى أراضي المملكة حديثاً نسبياً حيث تم تسجيلها وجمعها من مناطق عدة بما في ذلك المنطقة الشرقية ومنطقة الرياض...

تم تسجيل حالات وفاة في دولة الإمارات العربية المتحدة ودولة قطر وربماحدث ذلك في شرق المملكة العربية السعودية وسجلت هذه الحشرة في دولة الإمارات من ضمن الحشرات الخطرة على الصحة (Health Hazard) والذي يجب مكافحتها والتنبيه عليها...

The author of the post had some very delightful insights as well:
...
المهم لا نقوم بعمليات إبادة وقتل ونظلم لكن نحذر ونخاف على الصغار في البيوت لا تلسع واحد منهم ويفطس,

I love this guy.
He goes on and on about how he's worried about the ants, and he talks about young humans like their death would be nothing more than unfortunate.
"Ant got another one. Fa6as. Oh, well. 'Least we got five extras!"

I don't want a big deal made out of this, I just want media coverage and a statement from the Minstry.
Before the fucking ants get us and there's no-one left to warn.

Tell all your loved ones. Spread the news.
Once again, ubergirl saves millions of lives from otherwise inevitable doom...

I'm getting my news from a message board. Fucking unbeleivable, these people are.

ubergirl

P.S. There's a new post under this one.
Scroll down a bit.
There it is.

A Perfect Chance to Clear Something Up..

2007-06-15T15:03:00.000-07:00

There was a terrible accident where a girl died on a Jet-ski in the middle of the sea with her (supposed) boyfriend in Jeddah. Can anyone living there confirm this?

Anyway, this tragedy was the subject of a very emotional discussion over dinner on Wednesday.
The attitude of most of the girls at the table was:
"My God. What a horrible death. In a bathing suit. With her lover. Her poor father! They say he thought she was at school the whole time! Had no idea about her relatioship with this boy..."

Understandable, expected reactions.

And then I said:

What if she never missed a prayer?

What if they were in love, and planning to marry? What if they never slept together?

What if she were the kindest human being that ever lived?
And wouldn't the pain of her injuries have given her ajr and erased her 'sin'?

In real life, I am known to be overly sentimental. Yeah.

Everyone then realized, we know nothing about this girl.

And even if wedid know everything, can we fairly judge her? Are we capable of figuring out who goes to heaven and who goes to hell? (I'm talking to my fellow judgemental Saudis and Muslims.)
Can we honestly say what is a good way to die, and what isn't?

This is my point.
Here is when we shouldn't question or think about anything. Not with ahkam that don't sound right. Not with fatawa! Those we have a right to question.
This is where we shut the fuck up.

Speculation about people's lives and outcome is unproductive and damaging to your faith.

It's in Allah's hands.

ubergirl

Onwards and Upwards!

2007-06-10T07:58:00.000-07:00

I had a final exam this morning and when I read the questions I just didn't feel like being examined.

Examination is beneath me. It isn't... I don't know.. Pragmatic.

It's not that I didn't know the answers, I just didn't want to get into them. I get this feeling a lot now. I remember a time when I would strangle someone before I let them walk away unconvinced of my opinions.
Now I'm more indifferent.
It's worked for me, untill this morning.
When, you know, I stared into space for a full hour instead of answering the test.
Oh, well.

Botheration (yes, it's a real word) of the moment:

Those fucking idiots I am forced (well, choose. Whatever.) to converse with. The ones who think it's cool to call everyone "stupid Beduins."
Like they come from a fucking rainforest or something.
Very few people realize (and accept) that we are all Beduins.
It's fucking amazing if you ask me. I wouldn't want to be anything else. I love my heritage.

Anyway, they're the same idiots that think "Indian," "Sri Lankan," and "Filipino" are insults.

I told you.
Idiots.

Good luck on your finals, everyone!

ubergirl

"Le Luxe est La Necessite Qui Commence Ou S'Arrete La Necessite"

2007-05-24T15:31:00.000-07:00

I love Rosie O'Donell more and more everyday.
I know she has a big mouth, but you never doubt her sincerity.
She almost always says what I'm thinking, and when she doesn't, I almost always end up agreeing with her.
She is the one person that I can use to prove that America still has freedom of speech in the main stream media. The woman all but said George Bush is behind 9/11.
How is she still alive?

Today somebody who has known me for all of my life commented on how I "don't need a lot of things."
Things. Said it like this.
I was shocked. I'm always trying to be those people who don't need anything (and therefore don't want anything, and that sort of creates spiritual fulfillment. Or something.) but I thought of myself as a miserable failure at that. Ask my parents about me and my things. They think I have a problem.
And now I'm sitting at home thinking about what she said, and I'm not so shocked anymore. Now that I think of it, I haven't needed anything for a long, long time. I'm glad. It's nice.

Mona you are so dramatic. Also, appreciation is nice sometimes. I'm writing this here because I doubt that you really pay attention in real life. It's part of your charm.
It is.

Sometimes I wish I wrote my posts with half as much zest as my comments. So I'm posting a bit of comment that I really feel strongly about:

When will we as a community stop caring what people's sexual orientation is?
"It's haraaam."
I know. We all KNOW. Don't you think we've been force-fed this information enough for us TO KNOW THAT IT’S HARAAM?
I am not necessarily saying being gay is right, I'm saying it should not be something anyone cares about. There are much more important things that deserve our attention.

Life is a series of choices, we believe Allah judges us on the choices we make. Does it make any sense, then, for people (or a certain group) to gain power and FORCE others to make the choices THEY believe are right? What's the point of having a brain, of thinking, if not to make our own decisions that will affect OUR lives/afterlife?Man was not created to fit into a certain mold. Or a certain way of thinking.
We must be accepting. Loving. Compassionate. If we are not, then what separates us from rabid dogs?

And there you have it.

ubergirl

Paul Harvey, Sex, and Gay Men

2007-05-14T11:54:00.000-07:00

I realize the Paul Harvey is an insipid idiot. Thank you for all your comments (and Emails.)
I also realized a day after I worte my last post that I really shouldn't care what Paul Harvey says. And now I don't.

When will people mature and not giggle when sex is mentioned? We are not eight anymore, you idiots.

I am infatuated with gay men.

I am.

ubergirl

Paul Harvey is The Devil

2007-05-04T03:03:00.000-07:00

ABC’s Paul Harvey Compares ‘Women And Children’ Killed In Afghanistan To 9/11 Hijackers
Thursday May 03, 2007
Source: Think Progress
On his News and Comment radio show this morning, ABC Radio Networks host Paul Harvey said “the media should put a stop” to labeling “women and children” killed in war as “civilians.” He said, “It was civilians, for goodness sake, who decapitated New York City.”
Dictionaries define a civilian as “one not on active duty in the armed services or not on a police or firefighting force.” Harvey disagrees. According to him, “Since the invention of the aerial bomb five wars ago, there have been no civilians.” In other words, innocent people who are killed in war are military combatants because they are victims of a military attack.

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN
Paul Harvey News describes itself as “the largest one-man network in the world, consisting of over 1200 radio stations, 400 Armed Forces Network stations that broadcast around the world, and 300 newspapers.” President Bush gave Harvey the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 2005.
This isn’t the first time Harvey has callously wished for more viciousness in American war fighting. In 2005, he said the United States should use nuclear weapons in Afghanistan and Iraq. After recalling the use of atomic bombs during World War II, Harvey lamented that “we sent men with rifles into Afghanistan and Iraq and kept our best weapons in their silos.”
He then warned of the dangers of “civiliz[ing]” ourselves too much that we won’t use weapons of mass destruction:
We didn’t come this far because we’re made of sugar candy. Once upon a time, we elbowed our way onto and across this continent by giving smallpox-infected blankets to Native Americans. That was biological warfare. And we used every other weapon we could get our hands on to grab this land from whomever.
And we grew prosperous. And yes, we greased the skids with the sweat of slaves. So it goes with most great nation-states, which — feeling guilty about their savage pasts — eventually civilize themselves out of business and wind up invaded and ultimately dominated by the lean, hungry up-and-coming who are not made of sugar candy.
Digg It!
Transcript:
And hear this please. In Western Afghanistan, where NATO forces are involved in some of the deadliest fighting since January, among the 136 dead this morning suspect Taliban. But there are others, 51 villagers, mostly women and children. Might not the news media put a stop to such pulled punches wars as this, if we would just desist from categorizing civilians. It was civilians, for goodness sake, who decapitated New York City. Since the invention of the aerial bomb five wars ago, there have been no civilians.

I don't understand how a man who says something so ignorant and cruel is not taken off the air like Don Imus was.
I really want to know this: In his mind, how is what he said justified? Does he fully understand that he said he thinks it's okay to kill innocents? And what's more, he doesn't think they're being cruel enough already. He wants to use more 'effective' erradication methods.
He flaunts the fact that the Native Americans were slaughtered and robbed of their lands.

I am shocked. And no, I don't think his point of veiw should be respected. I think he should be loathed and... Exiled, or something.
Is it fair to even call him human?

From now on, Paul Harvey is "the thing devoid of all common sense and feeling."

ubergirl

World, I Am Not a House Plant

2007-05-03T15:04:00.000-07:00

Today my friend told me an incredible story.

At a security check-point in the Diplomatic Quarter a man and his wife were stopped. The officer asked the usual questions, what are you here for?.. ect. Nothing out of the ordinary.

And then, he asked: "Does this belong to you?" ("hatha taba3ak?", to be more precise) indicating the man's wife.
Like she were a house plant or a sock. Or a toilet seat. Or a dirty magazine. Or a box of rice-crispies. Or a pickle jar... Hey.. Thinking up random objects is fun!

Anyway.
I'm sending this message out into the world: I refuse to be a houseplant, and by gum if I am ever treated like one there will be hell to pay.

"Hell" being a hell of a lot of screaming from my end, ofcourse.

However, if I ran the world that culprit would be arrested and forced to eat fried mud for sixty-three days.
That'd teach him.

ubergirl

PS. Thinking up random punishments is also fun, by the way.

I'm No Genius, But Something Smells Fishy...

2007-04-20T06:42:00.000-07:00

There was an article in the paper about a man who was found decapitated in his farm in Al-Quassim. There were signs that he had been tortured. The officer who was assigned to this case was murdered the next day.
According to the article, the fact that the first dead man worked for the secret services (or whatever they call themselves) had nothing to do with his gruesome death. And according to them the second death has nothing to do with the first, and neither of the crimes have anything do to with politics.

I have one question.

How stupid does the media think we are?
I have known they take us commoners for fools forever, but this is ridiculous.
Incredibly comical in my opinion, but nevertheless frustratingly ridiculous.

ubergirl

I'd Always Rather Stay Home and Watch The Gorgeousness That Is Prison Break. Is That Healthy?

2007-03-28T07:27:00.000-07:00

I hate "people" who "use" quotation "marks" "extensivley." They come off "idiotic." You "know" who "I" am talking about.
You "do."

In other news, I had so much fun reading the comments on my last post. They were "amusing."
Okay I'll "stop."

Seriously. I got a couple of comments from... interesting characters. I've decided I'm going to be positive and not point out the incredible contradictions some people choose to implement in their sentences.
I hope one day it all becomes clear to them.

I am not anti-Islam. I am not anti-any religion. What people choose to believe is extremely personal. It is their relationship with their creator, or whom-ever they worship. It is not meant to be paraded around and when it is, I personally lose a lot of respect for them (the paraders).
And that is why I will never again address the subject of my personal beliefs on this blog, or anywhere else.
And neither should anyone else. (Mention my beliefs or cast me off as an "infidel", as someone lovingly implied in a comment.) It is hillarious that you think you are in any position to make that call. Like it's all up to you.
You reaaallyy are into yourself, huh?

Couldn't help it.

Back to positivity.

Some people comment for the sake of proving... something. Possibly that they can type. I'm not too sure.
Let us all revel in this gem of an opinion:

Anonymous said...
This is a typical bull of an upper middle class kid (woman) who starts to rant, and rebel against everything that her country and culture stands for. When in fact, you are not rebelling against your culture; you are rebelling against your religion. You started to take God for granted, those silly idiots from west who comments on your blog from the west trying to empower you, when in fact they are bringing you down to you eventual doom.

Wow. You got me.
I am trying to poison all the other crazy kids (women) with my Western thoughs and satanic beliefs.
Is it really that obvious?

Mona prank call this guy: 0555559191
And put his number up on AlWedd.

ubergirl

I'm Getting Increasingly Worse at Updating, I Know

2007-03-11T07:32:00.000-07:00

So today I was unwillingly dragged into a debate: Sexism in the kingdom.
I have to say, I am quite proud of my Saudi sisters.
Three years ago they -and I'm talking about the relatively conservative- would have always been on the Hay2a's side, for example. Not any more.
It's not a huge difference, mind you. Just really really big. To me, anyway.
I guess everyone's just gotten sick of it all.
Next will come the realization that we've all been brain-washed.
After that mass confusion. And if we're lucky, chaos and destruction. Maybe an explosion or two.

Yeeah.

I really am turning into a smug little brat.

So happy!

ubergirl

"And Yet, Wheels Are Still Turning.."

2007-02-22T03:35:00.000-08:00

I had been avoiding watching the news for a very long time. Until yesterday. It's just too depressing.
What is being done to stop Iraqi women being raped? Why isn't anyone being more clear about it? Their damned government is doing nothing but trying to cover things up for 'political reasons', and the Americans are not telling us where the woman is, or what 'treatment' she is undergoing.
Hasbuna Allah.
Yesterday I thought about Ali. Remember him? He lost his house, his entire family, and his arms at the beginning of the war. Whatever happened to him, I wonder.
I remember seeing a news bit about how he was doing physical therapy a little while after I heard about his story, and then about a year later I saw a book about him and his new family or something.
It didn't make me feel any better. I don't know why. It felt like.. A ruse.

Then I thought, 'how could people still think this war was about terrorism or freeing the Iraqi people?'
And then it came to me. People know it's only about oil. They just don't care about the Iraqis. They don't give a shit about others' suffering, as long as it makes them stronger and richer.

When did everyone turn into monsters?

ubergirl

Toot Means Berries In Arabic, Kay

2007-02-06T06:19:00.000-08:00

You know how you've always said exactly what's on your mind at exactly the right moment?
And there's this one person who scares the living shit out of you, and you never say the right thing and you always end up looking like a complete fool infront of them?
And ten seconds after they're gone everything you should have said basically floods your brain?

That person is my mother. She thinks I am a moron. And rightfully so.
Why is it that I never seem to do anything she'd ever be proud of infront of her? I know there must be some things I've done that she'd like...

Alright three things. Which isn't too bad, actually.
You don't know who I live with.

My wallet was stolen yesterday. I got reeaalllyy upset the first five minutes, and then I decided I wasn't going to let that be the cherry on top of an ubelievabley horrid day.
There are starving children in India who would give their right arms to have a stolen wallet be the biggest of their problems.

I hate when I start ending all my sentences with: "Oh who cares. We're all gonne die in the end anyway. We might as well be.... Civil."

Although it is kinda true...

ubergirl

PS. I'm fine, Kay :-) Thanks for asking.

Live And Let Live

2007-01-21T09:50:00.000-08:00

I do not - nor do I wish to - understand this desperate need people have to police everyone in the world.
I'm not talking about your friends asking you to stop telling that joke about the Lebanese woman on weed. I'm talking about complete strangers walking up to you in the middle of where ever the hell you are and asking you to cover your hair or face.

I'm sorry, I don't see how my supreme beauty is offending you.
Unless, ofcourse, it's unforgiving glare has caused you to go completely blind, and has therefore disrupted your shopping experience. In that case I will certainly cover my offensively gorgeous face.

Get a life. Not everyone is after your husband/wife/partner.
And if you're just worried about me going to hell for not listening to you, by all means, keep worrying about me. Forget all about yourself. Because we all know you're going right to heaven. Please. You cover your face and/or force all the females in your family to.
Hello, quick pass!

Otherwise, just look away. Or better yet, if you can grasp the concept of tolerance and acceptance, apply it. Right now.
You'll thank me later.

A few days ago a virtual stranger complained to me about "girls today and their disgusting tight jeans."
I gave her a fucking piece of my mind. I will no longer tolerate this... slander!

I have just decided that purple pyjama bottoms offend me.
Please!
Don't argue with me... Arguing with a fellow muslim is what the devil is telling you to do, isn't it?

Aaannnd... Green socks with... Uhh.. Blue stripes on them are also the work of the devil.
Burn the lot of them. Or... You're automatically agreeing with the devil.

I'm on a roll.

ubergirl

PS. I mean it. "Live and let live." It will change your life.

Let's Pick On Somalia!

2007-01-12T13:31:00.000-08:00

Yeah!

...Meanwhile, however, different reports are emerging from local residents,
talking to Somali media. They claim that the bombardment mainly hit pastoralists
gathered at a local waterhole and that a total of around 30 civilians had been
killed in the raids. There had been no indications of Islamist militia fighters
or al Qaeda leaders being hit by the strikes, these sources claim.

The Ethiopian Prime Minister, referring to reports from his troops at the
ground, today denied the US strikes had killed civilians. On the contrary, Mr
Zenawi said those killed "may have involved very senior [Somali] Islamist court
leaders."

According to reporter Mohamed, Somalia's Islamist leaders remain holed up
in a densely wooded area near the Kenyan border...

Honestly.
I don't even know what to say.

Okay yeah I do.

Wh-
How?-
AAARGH!

Somalia? As if you need an air-raid to kill a few terrorists hiding in the woods in Somalia.

I don't care if all the terrorists in existance were having tea together in a little town in the middle of Somalia!
If one innocent human being gets murdered in the process of killing them, it would be wrong. Why do these people think life is a video game?
You don't go around shooting people because it would be more convenient or more efficient than actually doing your job and tracking down the bad guys and capturing them.
These people that you murder don't get another life! This is it! Their children don't get other parents. Their friends and families don't get other thems.
In other words: GAME OVER.
Now do you get it?
Every human being that has ever walked on the face of this earth is valuable in some way. Killing them is wrong.

If you bomb a whole block because one occupant of one house is a terrorist, you create dozens of other angry terrorists.
Because when the other occupants get back from work or school or the grocery store and find that their families and homes no longer exist...
Let's just say that they will hold a rather big grudge on you. Not to mention they will have absolutely nothing to lose...
If I were you, I'd kill myself.
Now.

The United States and Ethiopian governments are on my shit list.

ubergirl

Grr.

2007-01-11T08:21:00.000-08:00

I believe that anything good that you do counts only when it is a secret.
When you do something positive without anyone knowing, and when you don't feel the urge to tell anyone, know that you have done something great.

Rant commencing in:
Five...
Four...
Three...
Two...
One.

Alright you little shit. No body cares about your little 'acts of charity.' And while other people might pretend to, I see right through it. That whole act.
Fucking prick. I know what you're trying to hide.

ubergirl

According To Rabindranath Tagore, These Are The Questions You Need To Ask To Truly Know Someone:

2007-01-07T10:47:00.000-08:00

1. What do you love? Life.
2. What do you hate? Injustice.
3. What have you lost? Faith.
4. What are you aspiring to? Success.
5. What are you afraid of? Regret.
6. What do you regret? Indifference.

So, What do you love? What do you hate? What have you lost? What are you aspiring to? What are you afraid of? What do you regret?
Do some soul searching and let me know.

ubergirl

Bang Bang

2007-01-03T16:11:00.000-08:00

In my dreams, I kill people.
Mostly accidentally, but I don't ever feel remorse. I just think: "Oh, well..." And go on with my dream.
Sometimes I just look down and I see a gun in my hand and I fire it at whoever's infront of me. It's never anyone I know, though. Just random faceless dream people.
Also, a few weeks ago on Oprah, she was interviewing a man who (in a state of severe depression) murdered his little girls.
I sort of... Understood.
I relate to that sort of... Dream-like state. Where your reasoning is non-existant and you do things because...

Just because.

I've never done anything violent in my entire life, and I don't plan to. I think violence is vile and I'm completely against the killing of anyone, but I still sort of... Knew how it happened.

Am I making sense?

Yeah. I didn't think so.

Okay.

Listen to this.
I have been singing this song non-stop for almost three days now. It's so good! Why isn't this guy famous yet?
I heart Josh Verdes.

ubergirl

Eleven Is The Magic Number. That's Why.

2006-12-30T07:12:00.000-08:00

1- A 2000 riyal Abaya my ass. I'm not paying that much money for something I despise. And I want to drive already. This is ridiculous.

2- Ladies, I love you as you are. Stop pretending you're boys. It's getting old. And you're not fooling anyone. Aha, not even when we close our eyes and pretend really really hard.

3- I highly recommend short hair.

4- It has never been this cold in Riyadh.

5- Am I the olny one who has no plans for New Years eve? I'm not even looking forward to it.
Honeslty, what's the big deal? So it'll be 2007. How will that be different from 2006? Or 2005? Or 847987?

6- Is it just me, or is Saddam Hussein being considered a martyr?
I am not surprised.
And not because we Arabs are fond of violent dictators.

7- Jackass is pure comic genius.

8- HAPPY EID!

9- Organised religion is going to be the death of me. 5alaaaaaaaaaaaaaa9999999 Leave me alone.

10- If you think I'm stupid I think you're a fucking lunatic who eats his own poo. (Yes, I saw.)

11- Love makes the world go round <3

Loving it.

ubergirl

Brains Over Brawn

2006-12-24T02:40:00.000-08:00

Yul Kwon won survivor.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEUIEFHYORGBQEYRF3GNFYM!!

YES!

Man, I'm SO HAPPY. Finally someone who deserves to win this game.

I would love to go on survivor.

Sigh.

ubergirl

لكم دينكم و لي دين

2006-12-21T09:30:00.000-08:00

When people talk about a muslim becoming an Atheist or whatever, generally they're sad.
Tell them it's a Saudi and all fucking hell will break loose.

I mean, it makes perfect sense to me. I understand how, among our society, this conventionalism most people call 'our' religion gets tiresome.

Except many people have not been taught that this is conventionalism and not Islam, and that is where the problem lies.
In my opinion, the most dangerous thing in the world to one's faith, is mixing it with tradition. Many of the things that we practice here are forced upon us under the guise of Islam. It's devastating. You start questioning everything you believe in, and eventually you start to lose your faith.
And no, I do not believe faith is a stupid thing to have, because I do not believe that it is 'blind faith.'
Faith is not blind. I know what I believe in, what I have faith in, and it exsists because I feel it and it is there and I know.
And it doesn't make me brain-washed, stupid, or naive.
It makes me a believer.
And I have a right to beileve just as (dare I say it) others have a right not to. Saudi or otherwise.
Oh, and I heart the Shea.
Can't we all just get along?

ubergirl

I Was Watching AlRai,

2006-12-16T02:58:00.000-08:00

and there was a rerun of this... talk show.
Basically it's a man who thinks he is close enough to God to critisize everyone and give them advice.
I find it all very ironic, to tell you the truth.
I mean... Islam is primarily about not recognizing false idols.
And yet there are people on television telling others how to worship their own God.
It is astounding to me.
Anyway.

So today the guy was talking about lesbians.
Imagine that. A whole one hour of television dedicated to putting down lesbians.

You know, it's hillarious how some people think lesbians in particular are... The spawn of satan or something. They're so dramatic about it.
Personally, I dont agree with gay people's lifestyles, but I try not to judge them. I don't think I do.
And I definitely don't think I'm better or worse than any gay person.
I just wish we could all live together in a castle in the sky where we ride winged unicorns and eat non-fat pink marshmallows all day.

However.
That is not going to happen in this lifetime.

So back to the guy on AlRai. A (surprise) Saudi calls in, and he start saying that girls turn gay because their friends turn them gay. "One bad apple spoils the whole bunch," is what he says.
Okay, I have a problem with that.
People are not friut. We have (hopefully) functioning brains.
If I want to become a homosexual, I will. Whether or not someone 'turns' me is not an issue.
Honestly. What idiots.
It is shocking that these people are this concerned about the rise in the number of lesbians in the Arab/Muslim world.
Somalia, a muslim country, is the most poverty stricken nation in the world.
Am I the only person ashamed that poverty still exists in this day and age?
And here we are still talking about how being gay is the "worst thing you can do to your family!"

How about wasting thousands on a television show, or a whole television station, that isn't doing anyone any good, when that money can save hundreds of families in Zimbabwe?
I know my family would be pretty fucking ashamed of that.

When will people stop trying to force everyone into their way of thinking?
How would they like it if I tapped their wives on the shoulder and told them to leave their husbands and join the lesbian band wagon because I think their husbands are complete douche bags?
It is, afterall, my opinion. And my opinion is really all that counts.

Some people are straight.
Some people are gay.
Accept it. And stop telling everyone how to think. You're giving me a headache.

ubergirl

Wait... How The Hell Did I Manage To End Up Talking About Condoms?

2006-12-13T09:10:00.000-08:00

I can't post from my house because blogger beta is a piece of **%%$#$$.
No swear word could possibly describe how much of a fucktard you are, blogger.

Oh! There you go, it's fucktard.

Moving on.
I believe in being polite. No matter what.
And I like to think I am polite. Most of the time.
It really shouldn't matter whether or not you're in a good mood. You should always be courteous.
So it really pisses me off when strangers look at you like you're a lunatic when you open a door for them or help them pick up something they've dropped. What the fuck is that about? I'm not gonna turn into some obsessive stalking freak if you thank me. You're not that pretty.
And then these same people expect you to just help them or do things for them. In their puny little minds, you exist to help them. It is the purpose for which you were created.
They would ask, for example "Where is building 23?"
And they would be shocked when you say you're not sure. And then, shock would turn into offence when you point out thate there is a sign infron of each building that tells you what number it is.
And what the hell are you thinking. Expecting them to thank you. Screw you for not offering to carry them to building 23. Fucking piece of shit.

Courtesy.
Apply it.

That sounded like those ads that encourage teenagers to use condoms.
Which is also good advice, children.

ubergirl

PS. I knew the title would catch your eye. Gillat 7aya.

I Heart Simpletons

2006-12-05T06:20:00.000-08:00

I wish some people would take themselves more seriously.
Let me explain.
Almost all the med-students I know either act really dumb, or are really dumb.
I am genuinely worried about the standard of doctors that are going to be around in 10-20 years.
This is how a conversation with a friend of mine who is in her second year of medical school went:
"I, like, saw you from across the room, and I thought it was you and then I, like, said to myself "it can't be her!" And then so and so told me it was you and so I, like, came by to say hi, like."
"Hi!"
"…Min jid min jid t3'ayarti…."
"Yeah. People generally continue to grow even after the age of ten."
"… Aham shay…"
I wanted to slap her.
This person will be treating our children when she graduates. She will be called a Doctor. They'll give her a stethoscope and everything.

Even if this is the way she normally talks – and I seriously doubt it
- she and all the people who talk and act like this, need to take
themselves more seriously.
I'm not saying we should all sit around quoting Freud. I am saying
that when you reach a certain age, you must conduct yourself
accordingly.
Words like 'min jid' and 'aham shay' are teenybopper zombie words. They mean absolutely nothing. They're filler words. People say them when they have nothing else to say, but still want to create some sort of noise using their mouth. Many people have nothing to say but wish to make sounds very often.
Don't you think that at 19 or 20 years old, one should find other –
more expressive – words to use?

And it's not just how these people talk. It's what they say, how they act. Just everything about them screams 'halfwit'. And what's sad is that most of them probably aren't halfwits. They just act like this because they think it's cool to be stupid.
The bright side if this is, it's these guys that make everyone else look good.

ubergirl

If You Want My Respect, EARN IT!

2006-11-25T05:41:00.000-08:00

I am sick and tired of middle-aged women abusing and taking advantage of me.
Just because I'm polite enough to offer you my seat, or help you with whatever you're carrying, doesn't mean you get to unleash your bitchiness on me.

A few days ago, I was at... Let's call it an event, with two of my friends.
One went to the ladies room, and I put my hand on her seat and sort of leaned on it. It was very crowded, and I felt I needed to save her seat.

So I'm talking to my other friend, and suddenly this (you guessed it) late-40-early-50-something year old woman comes over, and without even looking at me, brushes my hand aside and sits down in my friend's seat!

"Umm.. Ma3laish 5alti, ana 7ajza hatha ilma7al l9a7ibti." (Excuse me, Ma'am, this is my friend's seat. I'm saving it for her.")
"La, 7abeebti, hatha ma7alina i7na min zaman." ("No, my dear, this has been our seat for a long time.")
And she looks over to her imbecilic friend, and gives her (what she thinks is) a sly smile.
"You see this woman next to me?" I say in the loudest voice possible (without sounding like I've lost my mind.)
"Yes?" Replies my friend.
"She just stole Lulu's seat."
"Bitch!"
"She thinks she's so tough. You know, I hate how our society makes people think the older you are, the more you can boss people around. Just because she's "seen the wold" (yeah right) doesn't mean she can take out her frustrations on teenage girls. She doesn't know this, though. She think she has a right to my seat. She thinks the more she gets up there the more important she is. She thinks she is automatically respected by everyone. She doesn't know that in your 50s being an ass is being an ass. She probably thinks she's polite and civilized..."

And so on.
I don't even know what I said exactly. I just went on till she got up and found herself another seat.
I don't think I hurt her feelings, I think I annoyed her.

A few moths ago I picked up my cell phone and a (middleaged) woman shouted: "Lulwa?"
"No. Wrong number."
"What?! Who is this!??"
"Uhh... Who's this?"
"Don't ask me who I am. Let me just speak to Lulwa."
(Laughing) "Lady, you called me. I get to ask who you are. And this is not Lulwa's phone. It is my phone."
"Well I called Lulwa's phone not yours. Put her on."

This is what I have to put up with. I have to give up my seat to depressed, pushy old women (not because there isn't enough seating, but because she feels like harassing some young blood), or make Lulwas appear out of thin air for her majesty the queen of the deranged.

The middleaged should grow up.

ubergirl87

All Of A Sudden It's Cold and Rainy.

2006-11-21T07:23:00.000-08:00

I really have nothing to say, other than my toe has almost completely healed.

And school is so depressing. I hate people who think they're smarter than me. Because even if they were, (and they're not, trust me) they shouldn't be bragging.
And anyway, smart people as a rule don't brag about their brain power. So even you are smart, bragging about it automatically makes you stupid.
So there.

ubergirl

Someone In Here Smells Nice.

2006-11-15T02:27:00.000-08:00

Has anyone ever noticed that we don't have handicapped/disabled parking spaces here in Riyadh?
I only noticed recently because of my current temporary disability. Shut up. It hurts.
How do people with physical disabilities manage without the convenience of their parking spaces?
It just isn't right.
Isn't anyone campaigning or anything?

ubergirl

Apple are Vermin Because:

2006-11-10T06:34:00.000-08:00

1. They claim the iPod is user-friendly, and it is marketed as such. It's so 'user friendly' that it doesn't need a proper manual. If you have any problems you can visit their damn 'user friendly' website.
The truth of the matter is, it is not at all user-friendly. It freezes on day three, and you can forget about "easily uploading all you videos!"
Unless ofcourse, you plan on purchasing all of them from the iTunes store...

2. It is overrated. And frankly, setting the shit it needs up on your computer is a pain in the ass.

3. It is overpriced.
When I first went to buy an mp3 player, I was looking for something durable, easy to use, and I wanted to be able to play videos on it (which is not going to happen anytime soon). Cost wasn't an issue, as long as it had those three things.
It doesn't.
And looking back, I think 'I payed how much!?'
I feel like a sucker. Oh, wait I am.

4. It isn't just a matter of dragging and dropping a file onto your iPod anymore. You need to "sync" it with your iPod first. All in all it takes about 30 years to do that.
Happy syncing!

5. Their website offers crap advice.
"You're done syncing... Now your iPod plays videos without audio? Tough luck.

Oh! You want a solution? Yeah, about that...

There isn't one."

Do not buy an iPod.

Apple people, I am very upset with you.

ubergirl

Sexual Harassment Part... Oh Screw It. I Lost Count.

2006-11-05T06:33:00.000-08:00

This made me so upset.
You cannot imagine.

Firstly, I'd like to point out what it proves:
1. An Abaya and or veil will not protect you from harassment.
2. Our (yes, our. Women in many Arab countries have had similar experiences) youth is sexually frustrated to the point of insanity.
While reading I imagined a stampede of sex-crazed rabid dogs. It's like they're not even human anymore.
What does that to a person?

Go on.
Tell me the ladies were asking for their shirts to be ripped off. Tell me they probably liked it.
You know I love hearing it.

I feel as though I will never see an improvement in our society in my lifetime.
Hopelessness is not a pretty feeling.

"...If it was the action of one I would still be pretty outraged. Girls should fucking panic. Or shall we tell them oh it’s only a few guys who would possibly rip off your clothes in broad daylight, you know, it’s downtown Cairo, chill out and have a sheesha. It is this lack of outrage and a blasé normalisation of the sickness that has helped it progress unchallenged or treated for so long. "

I couldn't have said any of that better myself.

Sexual Education is the key. So are many many other things, but I'd so love it if we started with that.

There are stories of girls attacking other girls at schools and college, so it's not just a problem with boys.

I cannot imagine what the girls who were there are going through.

Allah y3awi6'hom bildunya wila5rah.

My Brain Says:

2006-11-04T02:03:00.000-08:00

Life really does imitate art. I cannot count how many times I have been reminded of my own experiences while reading a book or a play.
Greek Tragedies included.
Life can be so surreal.

Who else thinks the adoption of baby David is eerily reminiscent of modern slavery?
I'll admit I don't know many of the details that concern this particular case, but it looks to me that the adoption process was fast-tracked. God knows it takes an eternity to round up adoption papers anywhere in the world, let alone a country where running water is unheard of.
It is being called a legitimate adoption. I say she bought the child.

Who the hell came up with the concept of examinations? They should be tarred an featherd. And then urinated on.
I have no problems understading why med students should be examined. I completely understand why they need to memorize the intricacies of complex.... Err... Procedures.... And things. Yeah.
I just don't understand why it is necessary for me to.
I assure you, force-feeding me (or any other human being) information about communism is not going to save lives.
If ever the need for the information I have studied arises, I could always look it up.
I'm supposed to be studying for a test. Can you tell?

In other news, my toe is healing nicely.
And I'm still not getting any free candy, dammit.

ubergirl

I Hate It When...

2006-10-31T02:55:00.000-08:00

... I am told to "calm down."
I am calm, damn you.

Yesterday someone asked me to calm down on the messenger.
That was it for me. I have to vent.
And no, I wasn't saying anything mean or even angry-sounding.
She asked (nagged, actually) me where to find something on the internet for a porject she was working on for her drama class, and I referred her to like, the bestest website ever on drama that has, like all the answers to all the questions you could ever have about drama!

Just because I am not cold and passive doesn't mean I have a short fuse.
I am passionate. Not angry.

ubergirl

The Media Just HAS To Ruin The Image Of Everything, Doesn't It?

2006-10-26T16:04:00.000-07:00

There is this commercial where some girl falls asleep on a white couch and then wakes up worried she... Ahem... Made a mess.
Then she remembers she wearing X brand of feminine towel.

There is another magazine add where a tampon or towel is compared to a baby's diaper.

Who else thinks men came up with these ad campaigns?

Who else thinks they're beastly?

Alright now, show of hands, who here thinks the guys who came up with these add campaigns are somehow related to the cretins who design bras?
(Although, they're not entirely at fault. What simpleton hires a man to design women's underwear? Honestly.)
Anyway, back to toiletries.

What happened to the nicer ads?

Wait a minute, there's no such thing as the nicer ads.

They're all crap.

There's the diaper ones, the "brand X is more absorbant than brand Y... We even poured blue slime over them to prove it!", the "cotton-y feel" bull crap, the one where she's not comfortable bending over in yoga, and-
Who the hell cares.

I'll tell you what these companies should do, and I'm quoting a good friend:
"Absolutely nothing. We know to buy tampons and towels without hearing it on the damn TV. Like with comdoms and tissue-paper."

It's not that I think anyone should be ashamed of their period.
Periods are (hypothetically) beautiful.
I just think the way they're portrayed on TV is disgusting:

Woman: "Go away, perverted co-worker."
Perverted co-worker: "Fuck you, you bitch! What are you, PMSing?"

Someone shoot him.
Comedy my ass.

"نزول الدوره شيء جميل..رائع"

-أبله كوثر

ubergirl

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

2006-10-21T20:38:00.000-07:00

I'm having a wizard of Oz moment. I have been living in these shoes for three days. They're the only (really pretty) ones that my plastered foot fits into.
My very own Ruby Slippers.
I also only walk on yellow... Err... Things.
Honestly, there aren't enough yellow anything raods on this earth.
I demand more yellow brick roads!

MY TOE IS BROKEN.
My every desire must be met.
Hop to it.

In other news, it is now 6:51 AM and Mona and I still haven't slept.
We're quite proud of ourselves.
At sunrise strange things happen to your brain.

Very...

Very strange things.

I don't even remember taking that last one. Let alone remember the excuse.
Mona is fucking delirious.

Runs in the family.

ubergirl87

It's Broken

2006-10-17T16:37:00.000-07:00

I.
Broke.
My.
Little.
Toe.

When I was younger I read (I think it was) a Sweetvalley book, and one of the girls had broken her arm and was getting chocolate bars and the remote control and nice-ness in general from everyone.
In reality, when you're 19 and not 8, no one really gives a shit about your broken pinky toe. Let alone share their damn candy.
You get a little "awww! How did it happen?" but once you tell them you were running around the house (literally) at 3 AM like a moron the look of sympathy is replaced with the 'God, I knew you'd hurt yourself being yourself one day.' face.
In other words, laughter.
And mockery in general.

Drama drama drama.

And yet, for some bewildering reason...

I'm still in love with life.

The love-struck,
ubergirl

The Denmark Archives

2006-10-13T16:39:00.000-07:00

Oooh the Pope said something mean about Muslims!
Let's all sit around and pout!

For fuck's sake.
Why is it that people only pay attention to what the Pope (or the Dutch) say(s) when it's going to offend us? We couldn't care less what they think otherwise.

Honestly, who cares what anyone thinks of Arabs or Muslims.
I mean, people who think anything at all are automatically racist (or generalizing). Not that we should care, though.

Think about it. No-one started 'randomly' searching white American men at airports after the Oklahoma bombing.
No-one thinks 'opressed' when they see a Japanese woman in her traditional Kimono.

Why is the 9/11 attack any different than Oklahoma? Why is a Kimono any different than a Hijab?

The next time someone asks whether you know any terrorists after you tell them you're Saudi or Muslim or Arabic, don't try to clear anything up or 'salvage' our reputation.
When some cartoonist makes fun of our Prophet, don't pay any attention to it.
We know you love him.... It's probably why you choose to follow his risala.
There is no need to shout your loyalty off roof tops, unless ofcourse, you feel the need to prove something...

Our Prophet (pbuh) has clearly demonstrated that mockery should not be met with outrage. Al-Rasool chose to ignore mockery, didn't he?
Why do some Muslims today continuously give attention (and, consequently, further media coverage and exposure) to it?
Do Muslims today feel that Al-Rasool's method was perhaps... Not good enough for them?
I doubt it.

We love our Prophet, and Islam is definitely not a laughing matter, that's a given. We do not need to further clarify (nor get angry about) anthing.
Terrorists come in all shapes, sizes, colors and nationalities. Hate manifests itself in many things.
We (Arabs, Muslims) do not need to justify ourselves or give excuses.
If you think we're hateful or primitive, we shouldn't care.
If you don't think "we" are anything, if you think humans are idividuals and generalizing and discriminating against people according to race or religion is as logical as discriminating against people who own blue umbrellas and enjoy collecting nail clippings, then your brain is fantastical.

Help me channel our fellow Muslim's fruitless frustration into something more productive, like, getting Somalia out of the little rut it's in. You know, it can't be a lot of fun being the most poverty-stricken country in the world.
I actually believe Somalia needs more attention than Denmark and, yes, even the Pope.

I'm evil, you see.

ubergirl

"If You Put Things Off 'Till The Last Minute,

2006-10-12T16:49:00.000-07:00

They only take a minute to do."

That's good advice.
You're welcome.

God, my friends are amazing.

ubergirl

Animal Crackers In My Soup...

2006-10-09T10:32:00.000-07:00

I was sitting with a group of girls who were basically forcing their presence upon me.
It was okay untill they started talking about how much they spend on Chanel in Paris every year.
It became some sort of competition. Who spent the most money and where.

I'm sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Why do they think how much money their daddy makes/inherited is something to show off about? There are about 289738947209837249 people all around the world who can afford a Gucci key chain and a trip to Geneva.
It's not very special, I promise you.

I have a better idea for a competition: Who can burn their money the fastest.
Or who can eat a whole fried pink hippo in under three minutes.

I know what you're saying; 'Ubergirl, we do not mean to question your awesome brain power, but is there such a thing as a pink hippo?'

Yes.

My point is, saying you bought a Chanel bag is as pointless as pink hippo eating contests (which don't exist, because obviously pink hippos are an endangered species.)

I think I'm allegic to people.

ubergirl

PS. Wish me a happy birthday, everyone!

Saudi Television Is Becoming Controversial. Finally.

2006-10-05T17:01:00.000-07:00

Am I the only one who is happy our social problems have been put on "display for the world to see" on Tash-ma-tash? ( a Saudi Ramadhan TV show)

When will we understand that nobody cares about our moronic social problems?
People think they're funny. Franky, if I didn't have to deal with them on a daily basis, I'd think they're fuckin' hillarious!
I'm talking about the Hay'a, the sexism, and the tribal hang-ups.

No, I don't think I'm being un-patriotic by enjoying this "embarrassment." I think everyone else is being un-patriotic by continuing to practice or support the afore mentioned issues. I don't usually know how most people think, but isn't being sexist and thinking you're better than everyone because your great-great-great (x 298) grandfather belonged to some tribe considered the true embarrassment to your country?

And no, I don't think talking about our problems makes them worse. Sure, on Tash, they're mostly making fun, but atleast they're getting people talking! After that one episode we talked about the tribal issues at the dinner table! We all got to express our outrage at what's hapening! It was glorious!
Only when we communicate will we begin to resolve our issues.

This year Tash has exceeded my expectations.
Sure, I didn't expect much in the first place, and they didn't really deliver anything spectacular, but I am grateful to them for bringing up important issues.
I only hope they're not put off by negative feedback.

ubergirl

Yes, I Still Watch Survivor. Leave Me Alone.

2006-10-01T06:25:00.000-07:00

Who watches Survivor Cook Islands?
It's fascinating.
I'm serious.

At first I bought the whole "social experiment" thing. But now I know better.
Firstly, people shouldn't be thought of as Asian, Hispanic, black, or caucasian, let alone be sorted according to race. People are people. Race should never have been an issue, ever.

Secondly, I don't consider myself at all racist. I'm probably the farthest thing from it.
But this is what I caught coming myself saying while watching Survivor:

"I hope the Japanese team wins.

... Asian, sorry."

"How come the black guy's so aggresive?"

"That blonde girl is such an idiot. My God!"

I rest my case.

I'm not saying watching Survivor will make you racist. I'm saying it makes you say things and think things.
Not all Koreans are smart, idealistic, and good looking. (Okay maybe they are.)
Not all men of African decent are aggressive.
And not all blondes are stupid.

Other than that, I'm actually enjoying it.

I hope Yul wins.
I also hope I'm not the only one who wants him and the other Korean chick (Rebecca?) to hook up. They'd be the cutest couple in the world.

Go Yul!

Okay. Gushing over.

Actually, post over.

ubergirl

Green Is Also The Color Of Snot, You Know.

2006-09-27T06:55:00.000-07:00

I tried to ignore it. I really did.

This obnoxius "patriotism" is getting on my nerves.
The national day was last week, for God's sake! Why are people still "celebrating"?
Don't get me wrong, I am all for freedom of... Expression, if you want to call it that. I don't care if you want to wear green, red, blue or walk around naked to celebrate your country. Just don't nag me to join in the fun.
And do not pollute the stratosphere with your sickening rendition of a world cup song.
Believe it or not, wearing your flag on a t-shirt and singing does not make you a good citizen. And I'm afraid it doesn't even make you look like a good citizen.
Here's what does:
When your fellow Saudi is forced to divorce his wife because he is not "tribal", you do anything you can to help. You openly express your dismay, atleast.
Not agree with the judge.
Not think "how could she marry a non-tribal man, anyway?!"

I cannot begin to express how revolted I am by this story, and people's reactions to it.
How do people live with this much ignorance? Seriously?

ubergirl

Ramadhan Kareem!

2006-09-24T14:20:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wish I were American.
Because if I were, I'd just sue the hell out of everyone who annoys me (for emotional distress) and be done with it.
I'd be very rich and happy.
And they'd deserve loosing all their money because if you bother me then you're a shit eating shit head.
Who eats their own shit.
And everyone knows shit eating shit heads who eat their own shit don't need any money.
So I'd be doing everyone a favour by sueing them for all they're worth, really.
I'm so thoughtful.

I saw the Hay'a today, for the first time since I got back from our trip.
I hate them so bad. The ones I saw today were perverted and may God never forgive them.
It is not their place to tell me what will make my God happy.
I would've slapped 'em with about 10 million zillion lawsuits if I ruled the world.
On second thought, they wouldn't exist if I ruled the world.
Don't you wish I ruled the world?
Me too.

ubergirl

I'm Hungry

2006-09-18T05:47:00.000-07:00

I slept for 12 hours last night.
Phew.
I'm exhausted.

School is such a horrible place.
Where horrible people socialize.
And emit horrible odors.
I am so sick of interrupting my much needed sleep to go there. It's an hour long drive from my house. And going there is like stepping back into the year 1756.
I wouldn't be surprised if people still considered camels a serious mode of transport over in that part of the city.
Not that camels aren't charming. They are. Especially when they spew out the contents of their stomaches, which (I have noticed) are usually green.

You're welcome. (For the lovely visual up there)

Why is everyone at school so boring? And more importantly, why do they all have the same face? And dress sense?
The other day I laughed at David Letterman. You know your life is lacking in excitement when you laugh at a Letterman joke.
Honestly, what a stale, boring man.
Why is he still on TV? What is he, 97?
Everyone knows Conan's the man.

Long live the string bikini dance.

ubergirl

And She Saves Lives, Too!

2006-09-13T16:30:00.000-07:00

I was by the pool and one of the kids was drowning.
I can't believe how long it took for what was happening to register.
I felt shock and fear and I know everyone there froze. You can't help it. Your body just doesn't work anymore... You feel... heavy, is the closest word to it.
Next thing I know I'm in the pool lifting her out of the water. She was okay.
Very very shaken, but okay.

I like to think that I looked heroic. I dived (ever so gracefully) into the pool, fought off a killer whale, and retrieved the drowning child.
In reality she was in the shallow end. And I didn't dive. (Because if you dive into the shallow end you break your brain.)
The killer whale was totally there, though.

"You managed to find a reason to jump into the pool fully clothed on the one day you weren't wearing those sweatpants of yours. Good job!"

(After hearing of the incident) "Haha how stupid did you feel walking out of the pool in your sneakers? Man I'll bet it was the funniest thing..."
"It wasn't. Infact, I looked very cool. And sophisticated.

Just go away."

"Uber, what on earth are you going to do?"
"I can just borrow something from so&so's closet. It's no big deal. Although I didn't realize wet jeans are this heavy-"
"So&so's clothes are too small for you."

Leave it to my family to make you feel fat after rescuing a drowning child infront of their very eyes.

This post is going to inspire a Baywatch reunion or something, isn't it?
I can feel it.
I better get fucking payed if it does.
I do all the work around here. (Here being planet earth.)

ubergirl

Bringin' Sexy Back. (I'm running low on creativity. Give me a break.)

2006-09-12T06:51:00.000-07:00

The death of Steve Irwin made me sad. He was so enthusiastic. (That's not why I was sad, I was just stating a random Croc Hunter fact.)
And now Anna Nicole Smith (of Anna Anna Anna Anna Nicole! She's so outrageous!)'s 20 year old son.
Death is so scary to me. I like stability. It scares me that I don't know when my time's gonna be up.

On a much lighter note, the Bring the Sexy Cow back petition I signed (in my head) has worked. She's baaaaaack!
And I will personally walk to her house and slap her if she ever quits again. I know where she lives. Ya Mona.

ubergirl

I Make My Head Spin

2006-09-09T15:38:00.000-07:00

I am such an emotional wreck these days.
Everything makes me cry now. (So leave me nice comments, you jerks.)

I didn't go to school today because I overslept.
I'm so over that place anyway. I havn't yet learned anything new there. Except for the fact that I could teach all of them a few things.
Everyone always says college is a good experience because you meet people from all walks of life and bla bla bla.
Well guess what?
I'm not impressed by people from all walks of life.
I don't really know how to adequately describe my feelings towards the human race.
I don't know whether it is that I'm not surprised by anyone anymore, or that everything and everyone absolutely shocks me.
Crazy, I know.

I want to get in touch with myself now. I really do.
Someone once told me that because we are originally Bedouins, only the desert can soothe us. Quite frankly, that might be spot on.
I know rivers and forests and hills do nothing for me. Nice scenery in general does nothing for me. Except pictures of deserts and sand dunes. I've always been drawn to them.
The last time I went to the desert I was like, ten. I saw a snake.
I almost pissed my pants I swear.
Getting in touch with yourself sounds so glamorous. Like drugs and suicide. (Joke.)

Plus, Bedouins are terribly sexy, you know.

ubergirl

I Live Amongst Strange People

2006-09-04T15:43:00.000-07:00

My family is very tight-knit. We gather three times a week for lunch, and they put you through hell if you don't show up.
They are very... Colorful people.
I do love them. I really do.
I just have no fucking clue why.

They can be pushy. And insensitive. And hurtful. And sometimes, they take you for granted.

"Ubergirl, you've gained weight."
"No, I haven't."
"What do you mean you havent!? Am I imagining the weight you've gained!?"
"Am I imagining that the number on the scale hasn't changed for the past 6 months?"
"Yes."
"How convenient."

"UBERGIRL! WHY ARE YOU STANDING!? WE DO NOT EAT STANDING UP IN THIS HOUSE! YOU WILL SIT DOWN THIS INSTANT. DON'T ARGUE WITH ME!!!"
I sit. But not at the table. On a couch. Because my family has not yet noticed that its members have doubled in number during the past three years, and the table we sit at has not grown, nor have they provided extra seating.
And I'll be damned if I sit at the children's table.

While I am watching a good show on TV:
"Where the hell is my KitKat!? Uber did you eat my KitKat!?"
"I didn't touch your god damn KitKat. Leave me alone."
"Then where the hell is it!?"
"Hold on, let me use my KitKat Tracking powers... Hummm..... HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW WHERE YOUR KITKAT IS!? YA ALLAH!"
"Fine. You don't have to shout."
To get you to shut up yes I fucking do, evidently!

"Can I borrow that white shirt you wore last week?" I ask my sister.
Someone laughs.
"It wouldn't fit you!"
I don't say anything. Because it does fit.
And the only thing I can think of to say is very very mean.

After almost breaking my back helping someone move some ridiculously large vases from one part of the house to another, I get fucking shouted at because one of the 38947039 kids left their shoe somewhere and someone almost tripped over it.
I so should have ignored the blinding pain in my back, ignored that I wanted to get this over and done with, ignored the fact that I and my sister were the only people made to 'help' with this chore, and looked out for things that would potentially trip people up, and lifted them off the floor. I'm such a jackass.

"Ubergirl, what on earth are you wearing."
"Uhh... Sweatpants?"
"Those are GYM clothes!"
"They're comfortable."
"Huh!"
"Whaat? I always wear these when I come here."
"Ofcourse you do! That's why you always look... Disheveled!"
"Yeah. On purpose. Grunge is making a comeback, you know."
"Allah Yihdeeki bass." (May God.. Something. I don't know, lol.)

"Ubergirl, would you go ask so and so to do this and that and the other thing?"
"Ubergirl, please run upstairs and get me my glasses? Not the frameless ones!"
"UBER! Where have you been? I want your opinion on so and so."
"Uber, that's a very... Err.. Interesting outfit you're wearing.."
All at the exact same time.
Can you imagine.
All at once. And they don't hear eachother. In their little lala land, they're the only one who is asking me to do something or expecting me to give them an answer. I cannot at all give four people the same ammount of concentratin at the same time. So what I end up doing is making some lame joke out of it: "Boy, am I on demand!" Or, "I'm glad to see no one hates me anymore."
No one ever gets it.

A conversation with my father while I'm watching Prison Break:
"How very beneficial for Fox that everyone in this prison is good-looking."
"It's just these two that are. Not the whole prison, Baba."
Three minutes later:
"Tattoos? What- No one's suspicious? Are you actually buying this?"
"Yes, thank you. Now will you quit poking holes in the plot? Please Baba! I'm enjoing this."
He looks disappointed.

And the classic:
"Ubergirl did this and that." (Yes, they know I'm in the room.)
"Yes, only because-"
"Whaaat?!"
"You cannot be serious! What do you think, uber'smom?"
"I've given up. It's a lost cause."
"Will you just let me explain! I-"
"That girl is crazy, I tell you. Crazy."
They only stop talking about me when I leave the room. I am convinced it's a prank. They probably laugh for hours once I'm gone.

That was absolutely nothing, by the way. I have witnessed much, much worse done to other members. I live amongst strange people.

"The family - that dear octopus from whose tentacles we never quite escape, nor, in our inmost hearts, ever quite wish to. " -Dodie Smith.

ubergirl